


The Space Around The Stars

by Imagined



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Character Death Fix, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It of Sorts, Friends to Lovers, Guilt, Heavy Angst, Hurt Tony Stark, Illnesses, Injury Recovery, M/M, Mutual Pining, Not Canon Compliant, Outer Space, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Protective James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Protective Stephen Strange, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Space Flight, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-06-28 18:00:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 36,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19817575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imagined/pseuds/Imagined
Summary: Against all odds, Tony Stark wakes up.Using the Infinity Stones had an unexpected side effect. Tony finds himself burdened with unwanted powers - powers he can never hope to control and are dangerous to everyone he has ever loved. Stephen Strange's magic seems to be the only thing strong enough to shield the world from the danger he poses, but even the Sorcerer Supreme has his limits.The only way to get rid of the powers lies on the other side of the galaxy. But the universe has been trying to rebuild itself ever since the Snap, and a scramble for power makes the trip even more dangerous than it already was. The Infinity Stones may be gone, but there are some who will stop at nothing to take Tony's powers for themselves.





	1. Chapter 1

There is silence for a moment, the universe heavy with a decisive tension. Then –

‘’I am inevitable.’’

‘’And I am Iron Man.’’

And something Stephen had seen come to pass five years earlier happens, as Tony Stark’s lips tilt into a grimace and he snaps the Infinity Gauntlet.

~*~

The universe is a strange thing. Its powers are even stranger.

Once upon a time, an atom – something that contained the universe and all it would once become, all its dimensions and timelines and possibilities – split. No one can say what happened or why it did – time did not yet exist, and neither did reality. But this small atom did, and it created six Infinity Gems. The Gems disappeared out into the universe, not to be found for centuries. Some people did find one and use it, occasionally. Sometimes they were used for good, and sometimes for bad, but no one had ever used all six.

Until someone did, of course.

Power is a very strange concept. It is more than muscle and force – it can be a kind word that picks up someone, or a kiss pressed to a temple. Power is in all things, and not nearly as straightforward as all that.

This is why, when Tony Stark uses the Infinity Gauntlet, he doesn’t die. He is stronger than that – his soul forged by iron, his will created in the ashes of betrayal. Strength is not the ability to destroy, but the choice to keep standing. The power to make a sacrifice and stick to it, despite everything that will be lost in the process.

Tony Stark snaps and destroys his enemies – and falls to the ground with all the effort it took. The Infinity Gems _burn_ on his hand – burn all the way inside his veins and his skin and he takes a heavy breath as it settles inside him –

Pepper hangs above him, her eyes filled with tears as she holds his face steady. She presses a kiss to his forehead, whispering to him as a team of heroes stands behind him, silently watching and waiting. Silently wondering at the iron strength in their old friend.

Stephen Strange stands a few feet away, watching and wondering what will happen now. He never saw beyond their salvation – he does not know if the salvation extends to the one who ended it all.

‘’Pep,’’ Tony Stark whispers, his voice rough as he shudders. He is both cold and warm, and having trouble breathing.

He thinks it is because he’s dying. They all do, back then. But the universe has a tricky sense of humour – Tony doesn’t die, that day.

He just doesn’t wake up.

~*~

‘’He’s breathing,’’ Pepper says in disbelief as she sits before her motionless husband, her hand on his. The tears in her eyes glitter, and Stephen cannot tell if she’s crying from incredulity, happiness, or hurt. It doesn’t matter; he frowns and joins her, as the Avengers beside her watch.

Peter Parker sits next to her, not even trying to hide the fact that he’s openly sobbing. Stephen’s heart goes out to him, but his first worry now is Tony Stark sitting before him, eyes closed and mouth slightly open. He looks like a dead man – Stephen has seen enough to know that, at least. And yet, Pepper is right. Stephen takes his pulse and listens for his breathing, and Tony is still alive.

He had not seen anything beyond the snap. He had assumed, however –

Well. Maybe he should not have given up on Tony so soon. He turns to the Avengers standing beside them. ‘’We need a hospital, now,’’ he says sharply. ‘’He’s still alive, but his condition is critical. I can’t help him here.’’

‘’I don’t know if there are –‘’ Rogers starts, but one look from Stephen has him fall silent and nod. He steps away, most of the Avengers following after him. Only Tony’s closest remain with their sleeping friend – Pepper, Peter and Rhodes. Stephen ignores them as he tries for Tony’s pulse again. It’s fluttering, but it is still there. He wonders how Tony survived this, but decides not to focus on that. He is a doctor, and his first job is keeping the man before him alive.

He owes him that, at least, Stephen decides as he feels a surge of guilt flow through him. 

‘’Let’s get him lying down,’’ he says. ‘’Pepper, take his head – yes, like that. On your lap. It should help with the blood flow. Peter, Colonel Rhodes, help me take the Stones off.’’

‘’Shouldn’t we wait?’’ Peter asks, his voice tight as he watches his mentor with some sort of frightened awe on his face. Stephen would feel the same, if he allowed himself to. There is something about Tony Stark that simply refuses to give up or stand down in the face of grave peril, and the fact that his heart is still beating says something about his strength.

Still, he shakes his head. ‘’The Stones are the reason he almost died,’’ he points out. ‘’I’m not sure what they will do to him if they remain attached to his suit, but I doubt it’s anything good. We have to be very careful – don’t touch them with your own hands, and definitely do not use them.’’

‘’FRIDAY, disconnect Tony’s gauntlet from the rest of the suit,’’ Pepper commands, though she sounds frail. Tony’s head rests in her lap, his hair even greyer than it was with the dust of the battle. Stephen hasn’t seen it grow grey – he thinks of Tony five years ago. They haven’t spent more than a day together, and yet he has seen so many possibilities and timelines that it almost feels like he knows the man. 

The AI complies quietly, and the Stones come off Tony’s hand with a sizzling sound. Stephen eyes the Time Stone. The Stones cannot stay here; they will have to go somewhere, back to their own timelines. He knows the dangers of messing with timelines, and he has no desire to see any of them. He shakes his head. Rhodes still stands there, watching his friend with clear worry.

‘’Take care of the Stones,’’ he tells the man. It’s obvious he will not be able to help out without worrying for Tony. 

Rhodes nods slowly, bowing down to pick up the Gauntlet where it lies next to Tony’s hand, which is now bare. His fingertips are bent into the dusty ground, his nails dirty. It looks too lifeless, and Stephen wordlessly takes the hand to put it on Tony’s stomach. 

He is still alive. This is a good thing – Stephen just has to make sure he stays this way, though there is little he can do.

‘’Do we keep him in the rest of the suit?’’ Peter whispers, as if it’s too much of a sin to talk out loud. ‘’It looks uncomfortable.’’

‘’We don’t know if he fractured something,’’ Stephen declares with a glance at Pepper. ‘’FRIDAY can monitor his pulse. The suit will stabilize him, if nothing else.’’

‘’Tony,’’ Pepper murmurs, her hands in his hair as she slowly rubs his scalp. ‘’Tony, wake up for me. Can you open your eyes for me?’’

There is no answer, and Stephen lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. It’s foolish to think he would wake up, but none of what is happening is actually something he would have imagined, had he not seen it in the Time Stone.

He hears Rogers talking sternly to someone on a phone in the background, and wonders if help will come in time. He knew the battle, but he never saw the aftermath. There is a surprising feeling of loss and uncertainty, now he doesn’t know what path is the right one. And he cannot simply pick up the Time Stone and browse through the options – he may never be able to do that again. Their Time Stone was lost the moment he gave it up, and he knew that full well.

It’s a bit of a shame, though.

‘’Just try to keep talking,’’ he says to Pepper in what is his most reassuring voice, and rises to meet Rogers, but the Captain is still talking on the phone. Thor is standing next to him. There is a determination in his face that Stephen has not seen from him before.

‘’Help is coming,’’ the god of thunder says, nodding reassuringly – as if Stephen is the one that needs comfort, right now. Still, he ignores it and looks back at Tony.

‘’We’ll keep him alive,’’ he vows in that moment, and he knows he means it.

~*~

They have tried everything, in so far as Stephen knows. 

Stephen doesn’t think he helped save Tony, in any way or shape. The fact that Tony is alive simply has nothing to do with him or anything he tried. Tony had simply slipped into an endless slumber that no one could get him out of.

The world was close to being ruined – or at least, the part surrounding the Avengers Compound was. New York City was still intact, however, and celebrating the revival of their loved ones. Desperate tears and shouts, after five years of grief – after five years of having moved on, for some people. The streets filled with unbelieving laughter and clasped hands and all the while, rain falling from the skies as the Avengers rushed a broken body into the hospital, highest priority.

Stephen thought he’d enjoy it more – victory. It didn’t feel much like a victory, sitting beside Tony’s bedside as he’d discussed options with the other doctors. His identity is not as much secret as a source of confusion, to most. Everyone in the medical world knows Doctor Strange, but not a lot of people had known he’d become a sorcerer in the past few years.

Instead, he spends the first hours of returning to life sitting next to the shell of a man and figuring out ways to repay him. To return him to the family that he protected, to the world he saved.

Stephen has never been bothered so much by coming up short.

He knows that everyone has tried their best, but it’s a coma. Tony won’t wake up until he does, and that may be never. He’s Earth’s greatest hero, however, everyone hailing him when the news about his actions arrived at the masses, and no one would ever pull the plug, no matter how hopeless things seem.

They seem pretty hopeless, however.

The first day, everyone is shaken by recent events. And still, Tony’s hospital room is crowded until Pepper sends them all away. Stephen is one of the last to go, his eyes lingering on Tony’s pale face. He’d really thought he’d see Tony die today. Back on Titan, he had been so sure. He whispers a wordless apology as he leaves the sleeping man with his wife and daughter, and wonders.

The first week, hopes are soaring. Tony still sleeps, but the fact that his heart is beating and he is breathing by himself are seen as positive signs. Bruce Banner and James Rhodes surround themselves with scientists and doctors, anyone who may have any idea at all about why Tony isn’t waking up. Most of the doctors think that all Tony needs is time to rest – give his body time to heal from whatever using the Infinity Gauntlet did to it.

Stephen knows the toll it took, and wonders, and stays silent so as not to dash everyone else’s hopes.

But the weeks turn into months, with no cure to be found. Slowly, everyone falls silent so they won’t destroy anyone else’s fading faith. This only means that everyone is quiet, at the end.

~*~

Two weeks after the Battle, Stephen finds Steve Rogers sitting next to Tony. He is not talking, he is simply sitting there, watching his old teammate.

Stephen does not know what relationship the two Avengers had, but he can guess from what little knowledge he has. There is a mutual admiration, but they are too different to work alongside each other optimally. They butt heads, he has heard, and he can imagine the difficulties it must have brought.

And yet, there is no doubt in his mind that Rogers is mourning in silence.

He enters the room. ‘’Captain Rogers,’’ he says politely.

Rogers starts and looks up at him. ‘’Doctor Strange,’’ he returns. ‘’I almost didn’t recognize you.’’

Stephen is only here to check on Tony. There are anomalies in his blood he means to check out, but he doesn’t know what caused them. He cannot even reliably tell what they are, but hopefully they can figure out something about it. If it’s even important – but at this point, he’s ready to try all sorts of things. He promised, after all.

It means, however, that he is wearing his doctor’s clothes, instead of the clothes he usually wears in the Sanctum. He smiles grimly and shrugs. ‘’Can I help you?’’ he asks, but it seems pointless. Of course he cannot help. They are all here for the same reason, and yet none of them are able to help.

Rogers grimaces and turns back to Tony. ‘’I have to return the Stones tomorrow,’’ he says, and Stephen doesn’t know what it has to do with anything. ‘’I just – well, I know he’s not awake, but I wanted to say goodbye to Tony.’’

‘’He’s not dead,’’ Stephen says carefully.

‘’He’s not alive either,’’ Rogers says tiredly, and there is really no way to argue it, so he remains silent. Rogers continues, however. ‘’I know he’s not gone, but I wish I could’ve talked with him one last time.’’

Stephen takes a deep breath. ‘’You’re not returning, are you?’’

Rogers doesn’t look at him. ‘’Don’t tell anyone.’’

A short moment of silence, as he thinks. ‘’If you change your past, you will change your timeline. Things may turn out very differently. It requires a certain strength of will to deal with that. This will not be your future.’’

‘’No offense, but maybe this never was my future, anyway,’’ Rogers says, and rises. ‘’I should go.’’ 

With one lingering look on Tony, the Captain walks out of the door. Stephen looks after him. At least someone will get what they want out of this. He looks at the lonely man in the bed, quiet and still, and wonders if Rogers will be the only one who will be able to choose his own ending.

~*~

There is a lot to feel guilty about. Stephen visits Tony occasionally, even without trying to search for a cure; no one stops him from coming in. He knows the hospital room as well as his own, and he would not be able to explain to anyone why he still does this.

Tony’s skin is pale and dry. His face is clean-shaven, just to make things easier. Stephen thinks he preferred the goatee. He remembers their meeting – the day Thanos came. He didn’t particularly like Tony, or care for him at all. To be honest, he hadn’t quite known what to think. And yet, he’d had a plan that was dependant on more than a few things, and the most important factor was Tony’s willingness to sacrifice himself for his home and its safety.

For everything Stephen thought of Tony Stark, he’d never doubted that Iron Man would come through, in the end. For all his worries, that had never been one of them.

He starts out of his thoughts when the hospital door opens again.

‘’Pepper,’’ Stephen says. She looks surprised to see him as well, but composes herself rather quickly as she strides into the room. Morgan Stark follows her, with dark hair and quiet brown eyes. She has grown a lot, and her father isn’t here to see it.

‘’Doctor Strange,’’ Pepper greets him, and Morgan murmurs the same greeting. ‘’I didn’t expect to see you here.’’

‘’I was –‘’ Stephen starts, and looks at Tony. ‘’Thinking.’’

Pepper looks strangely at him, but doesn’t ask why he’s doing that here. They do not know each other that well, after all. To Pepper, Stephen is the man who knew what would happen all along and the man who’d tried to keep him alive first thing after. It’s fair to say she’d spent some time screaming at him, after the first days when Tony wouldn’t wake up.

And Tony just laid there, being kept alive with tubes and somehow too stubborn to die.

Pepper moves forward to kiss her husband on his brow. ‘’He would hate this,’’ she whispers, but she doesn’t cry anymore. All the tears have long been spilt, in this regard. They are just all calmly watching and waiting to see what happens each day, and so far, not much has changed.

Stephen can’t claim to know Tony very well. Yet, he silently nods as he watches Pepper and Morgan bow over him. Morgan’s face betrays none of her grief, but she takes her father’s hand far too gently to think she isn’t affected by seeing him, still. 

‘’I should go,’’ he says in a low voice. Pepper and Morgan do not even look at him – he is an intruder into their family, not belonging and unwanted. He is the reason Morgan’s father is silent and pale, his mind somewhere far away. He rises, grimacing at the sound his chair makes when it scrapes over the floor.

There is a debt he can never repay, but he can at least try.

~*~

Everyone knows what Tony Stark did. Everyone is thankful.

But after four years of endless sleeping, things change. The world learns to go on. Less people sit beside the bed, waiting for something to change. Daily visits turn into weekly visits turn into biweekly visits.

Stephen leads his Sanctum, and yet he never can truly put it out of his mind. He remembers the mind-numbing disbelief when the battle ended and Tony Stark still lived. He knows the relief all of them felt, and yet – nothing has come from it.

Perhaps he has changed more than he thought. Perhaps he believes in a reason – perhaps he just believes that Tony Stark survived for more than just this. He doesn’t know why, and he never mentions it to anyone else. Wong eyes him oddly whenever Tony Stark comes up in a conversation, however, or when he knows that Stephen goes to check up on him.

He doesn’t do it often, but he still does. He has made sure that he is up to date on Pepper and Morgan’s situation, and at least they are doing well. Tony would have wanted that, he is certain. Morgan is a bright child, mirroring her father in more ways than one, and Pepper has learnt to deal with what has happened. She smiles more often, and she works mainly to bring back the world before the Infinity War.

Stephen can only admire her strength as he watches the world go on.

~*~

It’s early morning when something shifts.

Pale light falls on the hospital bed. No one else is there but the man who has slept for four years. It starts out small – a finger moves, trying to see if it can. The nail is clean, as all dirt has been scrubbed away from him.

All the digits splay out on the bed as the breathing picks up. Tony Stark’s eyes are still closed, his mind still far away as the rest of his body demands his attention. 

It is his own gasp that wakes him up, eventually, and his eyes shoot open in disorientation. The light hits his hand, warming it up so that he can see his own blue veins. It is the first thing he sees – except the blue is slowly turning green and orange before going back to blue, almost as if it’s glittering.

He takes another deep breath, ripping away all the tubes with his other hand as he stares, eyes wide as he tries to catch up with whatever is going on. His whole hand starts tingling red and blue and he falls out of his bed, something clattering along as he goes. 

He balls his hand into a fist, trying to stop the pressure on his lungs as he goes for yet another lungful of air. Something starts beeping in the distance, and he closes his eyes again. He does not see black, however, but a dark red in front of him – there is no escaping the colours.

Something builds up in him, and he cannot control it. He leans against the bedframe, trying to regain composure, but his legs don’t cooperate when he tries to stand. Anxiousness rises in him with his own inability to move, and he clasps the sheets tightly with all the strength he has.

His hand is still changing colours, the tightness in his chest rising. The alarm is straight-out blaring, right now, but he manages to ignore it as the world sways in front of him in a multitude of colours. There is a shrill sound in his ears that doesn’t come from the room but from him, he is absolutely certain, and he presses his hands against his ears just to try and make it stop.

It doesn’t stop, and neither does the tight feeling in his chest, and he screams to get it out.

Something explodes, both inside him and outside. The sounds stop – complete silence greets him, and Tony heaves out as he dares open his eyes again.

The bed has been flung against the wall, all the equipment broken. There were two chairs before that are hardly recognizable anymore, and Tony looks around him in despair, breathing heavily. He looks back at his hands – they are back to their normal skin colour, perhaps a bit paler than he’s used to. He has lost his callouses, and he frowns as he goes back to staring at the door, still trying to regain his composure as he remains seated on his knees.

Someone familiar appears in the door opening, staring at him in open wonderment. Tony has to take a moment to recognize Stephen Strange – but that’s perfect. If there is anyone who would know what this is, it should be a sorcerer.

‘’What happened to me?’’ he croaks, still trying to hold onto something, but he just blew up the one thing he could lean against. His voice doesn’t cooperate, as if he hasn’t used it in a long while. Everything about him hurts.

Strange opens his mouth, and that is good – Tony wants answers.

Before he can get any, he passes out again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone who got through the first chapter - hi there. I hope you enjoyed, because this is going to be a long one. I'm really excited to finally get around to posting this, because I've been working on it for a few weeks now. Can't wait to share the fic with all of you! 
> 
> and thanks to Turtle for beta'ing for me! I really appreciate it!
> 
> Comments, kudos and bookmarks make me the happiest gal in the world :)


	2. Chapter 2

Tony isn’t sure how to feel about anything that has happened since he woke up. His head feels woozy and he is wildly aware of how tightly he is clasping the white hospital sheet as he sits upright. If he had any choice, he’d get up and walk just so he could get his mind straight, but he thinks he’d collapse as soon as he’d try.

Pepper sits next to him, her eyes red-rimmed as she regards him. 

He has missed so much – he has missed four years, if everyone is to be believed. There’s no reason not to, and yet – it feels so otherworldly. He feels like he just got his world back, and he remembers their fight with Thanos as if it was yesterday – it was yesterday, to him.

And yet there are threads of grey in Pepper’s hair where they weren’t before. He dreads to see the passing of time in his other friends and in his daughter, and wonders what else will have changed. He isn’t sure he wants to hear.

On the other hand, perhaps that would be better than hearing what has changed inside him.

Stephen Strange and Bruce are sitting on the other side, and these are all the three people he’s seen so far. Bruce is still large and green, so not much has changed on that front, and Strange – well, he barely knew Strange to begin with. It is difficult to say why the man is even here to help him.

They are clearly invested, however. They have already drawn blood and done some tests, and Tony just wants to know what happened to him.

‘’How did you never find out what happened to me before?’’ Tony asks, and feels vaguely annoyed his voice is still so raspy. Coughing doesn’t help and only upsets him more. At least no one will accuse him of talking too much – he’s kept his mouth shut for four years straight.

Strange glances at him. ‘’These aren’t exactly standard tests,’’ he says, and the fact that he sounds so completely in control only makes Tony feels more irritated. ‘’There was no reason to believe it was anything but an ordinary coma.’’

‘’Except for the fact that it happened after I did what I did?’’ Tony says. He can’t mention Thanos’ name yet, or refer to the Stones. It may have been years ago for everyone else, but his heart still starts racing at the thought. Honestly, he is surprised to be awake at all. He thought he’d die, snapping the gauntlet.

And yet, here he is. ‘’We didn’t find anything weird,’’ Bruce says. ‘’It was all – wait. Stephen, look at this.’’

He shows the tablet to Stephen. They’ve been looking at the results together, ignoring any help from other doctors who’d tried to get in. Tony feels oddly touched by that gesture.

Stephen frowns at it. ‘’Is it good?’’ Pepper asks anxiously. She is still pale, and Tony doesn’t know how to comfort her. He doesn’t know what to say at all – this is a situation he never thought he’d be in. He has missed almost half of Morgan’s life by now, and he doesn’t even know how much she remembers of him.

It hurts, and he has no idea how to make that kind of thing go away. Maybe he can’t.

‘’It’s – revealing,’’ Strange says thoughtfully. ‘’There’s something in your blood that’s not exactly… human.’’

‘’It’s radiation,’’ Bruce adds. ‘’Not the kind of radiation we know. This is similar reading to our readings of the Infinity Stones. We checked when we had them, when we were creating the Gauntlet to reverse the snap. It isn’t exactly the same, but it’s strangely similar.’’

‘’Perhaps not so strange. Perhaps the Stones changed part of Tony’s biology.’’

‘’You mean it rewrote my DNA?’’ Tony asks in disbelief.

‘’Only partly?’’ Bruce offers.

‘’And not so much rewrote as added something,’’ Strange says. It doesn’t help.

‘’Let me get this straight,’’ Pepper cuts in, and that’s more like the no-nonsense woman that Tony knows and loves. ‘’When Tony used the Stones, he was affected by them. For what reason? What did it do to him, exactly? Is it why he didn’t wake up?’’

‘’I can’t say anything for certain yet, but if our current hypothesis is true, I think the Stones are the reason he survived in the first place,’’ Strange tells them, and his frown is deep as he appears to be in deep thought. ‘’The Stones are too powerful for most humans, even when only one is used. To use all six requires a strength – maybe they tried to make sure they could be used. I’m not sure – it’s a tricky subject, and one that requires further thought. I cannot say for sure what the Stones did to Tony.’’

Tony thinks back to that moment he first woke up. It’s all a bit vague to him, but he remembers his own panicked thoughts as he’d watched his hands glow up. There were six colours that had streamed through his veins. Strange may want to do more research before he can say anything, but Tony knows.

‘’It gave me something I can’t control,’’ he says, and watches his hands again as he loosens his hold on the sheet. He is safe for now, but he knows what happened to the room he was in.

He may be safe, but there is no way that the people around him are. Fear tightens his chest and he closes his eyes, and ignores the way the others fall silent.

~*~

Somehow, Tony thought the beeping would annoy him, but perhaps it’s comforting. The monitor grounds him in reality, even as Pepper holds his hand.

It’s only the two of them, right now. Like it has been for such a long time – only now, everything is different. Or at least, Tony thinks it is.

‘’Four years,’’ he says, interrupting the beeping. ‘’Do you – I’m sorry, Pep. I’m so sorry.’’

‘’For what?’’ she asks, and tightens her hold on his hand. ‘’You saved everyone. The danger has passed, and it’s all thanks to you.’’

‘’I thought I would die.’’

Pepper’s gaze is heavy on his. Her blue eyes are steady, but there is something unnameable in there, something that Tony doesn’t want to see quite yet. ‘’So did I,’’ she answers quietly. ‘’But you didn’t.’’

Tony breathes out. It matches the speed of the beeping; for every two beeps, he takes a breath. It’s mathematical and easy, unlike anything else that is happening. He has no idea what to do – he’s not even sure he knows the world anymore. Maybe it’ll be better, but for now, he is lost.

‘’What now?’’ he asks, as she looks away. ‘’Pepper, I don’t – I have no idea what the past four years have been like for you. And I’m almost afraid to ask. But there’s – I need to see Morgan, just to know she’s okay. I want to see the others. I want to find out how to fix this thing.’’

‘’Maybe there’s nothing to fix,’’ Pepper stresses. ‘’Maybe this – this blowing-up your room was a one-time thing.’’

Tony shakes his head. ‘’There’s something in my veins left of the Stones,’’ he reminds her. ‘’It’s not going to rest easy now, Pep. I don’t know if I’m safe to be around.’’

‘’So you’re going to wake up and not be around?’’ Pepper asks.

‘’Of course not, I’m just –‘’ Tony stops and closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose with his right hand. When his eyes open again, he looks at his hand for a few seconds. It’s still its normal skin colour, but there are faint scars that he didn’t have before. He thinks they must have been worse, but does not know if someone helped to make the scars fade or if it happened naturally. 

‘’Tony,’’ Pepper says, and she leans over him. There are worry lines around her eyes, her eyebrows lighter with the touch of grey. He wanted to grow old with her, once, and his heart hurts to think about her going on without him. That he’s missed the coming of the first grey hairs – did they arrive soon after the battle? – or the sleepless nights taking care of Morgan when she was ill. There are so many things he missed, and he’s sure he can’t even think of all of them.

And it is time he can never get back. He takes a deep breath as she presses a kiss against his forehead and holds it there for a while. He grasps her as tightly as he can, holding her close to him as he feels himself trembling.

‘’Everything has changed, hasn’t it?’’ he mutters. ‘’And it’s not going to go back to the way it was.’’

‘’I don’t think it can,’’ Pepper whispers, and she sounds so grieved that Tony cannot help but mourn with her. 

Not mourn him, this time, but mourn what he had before.

~*~

Going to the hospital again feels odd – Stephen hasn’t been there so often since the beginning of Tony’s coma, and before that, when he worked in one. But now Tony is awake, though not quite in the way they’d all hoped.

He isn’t sure what exactly they were hoping for by this point, however.

He remembers seeing Tony sit in the destroyed room, his entire body glowing with something that was quickly dissipating. Tony’s frightened expression hasn’t left his thoughts ever since, and Stephen hadn’t hesitated to call in help.

When he opens the hospital door, he isn’t surprised to see Pepper still sitting there. Morgan has joined her this time, though, and she’s sharing the bed with Tony. Both the father and the daughter’s eyes are closed, their breathing deep as they slumber.

Once again, he feels like an intruder. But this time, everything is different.

‘’How are you doing?’’ he asks Pepper, sitting down next to her. She grimaces at him before turning back to the hospital bed next to her, caressing Morgan’s forehead. 

‘’Shouldn’t you ask me how he’s doing?’’ she asks.

Stephen shrugs. ‘’Should I?’’

Morgan murmurs something in her sleep and shifts closer to her father. Even as she sleeps, it is clear to Stephen that she has been crying. Her eyes are red and swollen, faint tear tracks still visible on her cheeks. The bed is not made for two persons, but the way they are snuggled together makes something in Stephen warm. 

Tony is alive and not in a coma anymore, and that is at least something.

Pepper removes her hand from Morgan’s hair, letting it rest on her lap instead. ‘’I didn’t believe he would wake up,’’ she whispers. ‘’At the start – I’d hoped, of course, I still had faith. But it has been four years since I’ve last talked to him. And I feel guilty.’’

‘’Because you’ve moved on,’’ Stephen says.

‘’But he hasn’t,’’ Pepper points out as she takes a deep breath. ‘’How am I ever going to tell him that – I loved him, I still do. But it’s not like that anymore.’’

‘’All you can do is be honest with him. Tony will understand.’’

‘’You barely know him,’’ she retorts, and Stephen leans back. Her eyes go wide. ‘’I’m sorry – I didn’t mean –‘’

‘’You’re right, of course,’’ he interjects smoothly. ‘’I haven’t spent much time with him. But as you have pointed out before, I am the one who is to blame for what happened. I set the world on this path, and I know I did the right thing – even if Tony’s life was the price. It is a price he was willing to pay, and I knew that. I have seen countless ways that the future could be shaped, and in all of them, Tony was a good man. A lost man, sometimes, but always a good one. So no, I do not know him as you do – I do not claim so. But I know he wants nothing more than for you to be happy, because I have seen him sacrifice himself a thousand times so you would be alive.’’

It is not the first time he has mentioned what he saw on Titan, and it is not the first time they have talked about Tony’s sacrifice. At the start, Pepper had shouted at him, tears in her eyes, batting at his chest in her own desperate grief. And here at the end, her eyes soften and she turns away.

‘’Knowing that only makes it worse,’’ she eventually says. And there is not much that Stephen can say to that, because she is right. If she indeed has moved on, she will break a good man’s heart. It will hurt on both sides, but that does not make it any less right.

Stephen only came in to take some more blood, but it can wait. Pepper Potts may not be his patient, but she is a woman deserving of his time. He waits with her a while, just quietly watching.

It is Tony who wakes up first. His eyelashes flutter before he properly opens his eyes, and it takes him a few seconds to register where he is, it seems. His head turns to look at Pepper and Stephen, and a small smile graces his lips. ‘’Were you watching me sleep?’’ he asks, a hint of a tease in his voice.

‘’I think you’ve done enough sleeping,’’ Stephen says wryly and rises. ‘’I need to take some more blood – Doctor Banner is running tests with some colleagues, trying to figure out if there is a way to remove the Stones’ power from your cells. How are you feeling?’’

Tony works to sit up without waking Morgan. The look in his eyes is far too tender and Stephen feels like he is not supposed to see it; but the love he has for his daughter is impossible to miss. Tony doesn’t look up from her as he responds without answering the question. ‘’Did you come any closer to figuring out a solution?’’

Perhaps Tony himself would be able to help, but Stephen is not quite ready to let him get out of the hospital yet. He is doing well, all things considered, but his muscles have barely been used in four years and Tony needs to regain his strength before they can even consider letting him solve his own problems. There are enough geniuses focused on the bloodwork without letting Tony collapse.

‘’Not yet,’’ he admits. ‘’It has only been a day, and there is a lot to consider. Your situation is quite unique, and not even – Tony?’’

Tony is not paying attention to him anymore, his eyes fluttering as he pales. The man squints at something far away, almost as if he is ready to throw up, and Stephen’s doctor instincts are screaming at him to help.

A soft red glow comes from Tony’s skin as he starts shaking and presses his eyes closed. ‘’Morgan,’’ he mutters. ‘’Pepper, take Morgan.’’

Pepper stares from Tony back to Stephen, but rises before he can say a word. She yanks at her daughter’s arm, causing Morgan to wake up in panic as her father takes deep breaths. Stephen almost throws himself at the bed to grab Tony by his wrists, trying to keep him down. ‘’Get out,’’ he tells Pepper.

‘’Dad!’’ Morgan yells out, trying to fight her way back to Tony, but Pepper’s grip on her is too tight for her to break.

‘’You saw what happened to the other room,’’ Stephen urges her.

Pepper frowns, clearly hesitating for a second, but then drags Morgan along with her. Stephen can hear her voice yelling down the hallway, but loses focus as he shifts his gaze back to Tony. ‘’You have to stay calm,’’ he tells Tony, still pinning him down on the bed. ‘’You have to control this.’’

Tony lets out a raspy gasp, clearly struggling with his breath. Stephen mutters a quick spell under his breath as he lets his magic examine the man before him; something is taking hold of Tony, something far stronger than any of them.

The residue of the Stones’ power lives on in Tony’s veins, and Stephen cannot command it or control it. Tony, weak and injured as he is, has even less of a chance. Stephen curses as he lets go of Tony and takes a step back.

He cannot stop the flood – but he may just be powerful enough to contain the damage. Quickly making up his mind, he creates an orange shield around Tony’s body. If it doesn’t work, the blast coming from Tony may be enough to kill Stephen and perhaps someone in the hallway as well. They were in luck last time that no one was harmed, but this is a busier time in the hospital, and any passer-by may get injured.

The shield has only just formed when Tony lets out a yell and he hears the sound. A bright red light flashes inside the space; Stephen holds onto the shield tightly, trying to keep it steady against the powerful blast. He strains against the enormous power that pushes at the shield, almost feeling himself be blown away. Gritting his teeth, he holds his ground, taking a deep breath so he can hold onto the shield – it can’t be allowed to break. It takes all his strength to keep it there.

The light is gone again within a second and the shield gives way, but Tony remains on the bed, his body still on the hospital bed as the glow dies down.

Stephen falls as the pressure disappears, scraping his elbows, but quickly gets back to his feet. He makes his way to Tony, quickly checking the room. His spell seems to have worked: the blast was fully contained, but he does not know if that harmed Tony. When he reaches him, however, Tony seems uninjured. His eyes are still closed and his skin is sweaty and pale; but when Stephen checks his temperature, he doesn’t run hot. There are no signs that anything happened to him and Stephen frowns at it.

He’d barely held the blast, but his shield was powerful enough to withstand it. That is the good news, at least – at least someone has the power to protect others from Tony. The bad side, however, is that the powers were not a one-time thing. Tony can obviously not control them and has no say in when and how they appear. They might be able to help along somewhat, but Stephen doubts a human will ever truly master such a raw energy.

It is worrying, in the overall, though disaster may have been averted.

‘’Tony,’’ he mutters, taking the man’s pulse just to be sure. It’s racing, but there is nothing unnatural about that. ‘’Tony, wake up.’’

Tony’s eyes flutter open, troubled as his gaze focuses on Stephen. ‘’Morgan?’’ he asks, his voice hoarse once again.

‘’Everyone is safe,’’ Stephen assures him. ‘’You didn’t harm anyone. Pepper and Morgan are alright. Are you feeling okay? Did you feel it coming?’’

‘’It’s like I’m overheating,’’ Tony says, struggling to sit. Stephen helps him, despite not being certain that he shouldn’t just lie down. ‘’It’s like – this raw sort of pain trying to find its way out. I can hear it, and if I don’t let it out, it will burn me alive from the inside.’’

There is a quiet sort of pain to his voice, and Stephen doesn’t mean to ignore it, but he doesn’t know quite what to say. ‘’We’ll find a way to fix it,’’ he says.

‘’What if you don’t?’’ Tony says, and his eyes are dark and determined. He grabs Stephen by the arm before he can lean away. ‘’I’m not – this isn’t – I’m a threat now, Strange.’’

‘’Nothing happened. You’re not a threat, this is an illness. And illnesses can be cured.’’

‘’Stop that,’’ Tony demands, and tugs at him. ‘’I’m not joking. This isn’t a game, and I’m not one of your patients. Whatever happened to me, if we can’t fix it – you can’t protect me forever, can you? Can’t you make me some sort of amulet – some magic, to protect everyone around me?’’

Stephen frowns, and shifts. Tony is still holding on to him, his expression not wavering though he seems exhausted. ‘’Your powers – they’re strong,’’ he tries.

‘’They’re not my powers.’’

‘’Nonetheless they’re inside you. I don’t believe there can be any artefact strong enough to deal with them – it almost overpowered me.’’

There is a quiet moment when Tony’s expression wavers for a moment, but the determination returns tenfold afterwards. ‘’Then you can’t let Pepper and Morgan come back in,’’ he says resolutely.

Stephen finally pulls himself away, but only to find himself staring at Tony. ‘’What?’’

‘’You heard me,’’ Tony insists. ‘’What if this doesn’t work, the next time? What if you’re not here? If Morgan is here, and this thing comes back – I know you don’t have kids, but if I hurt Morgan – I can’t, Strange. She and Pepper, they’re everything. You can’t let them near me. Not until we find a way to fix this.’’

‘’I’m not sure she will listen,’’ Stephen says. 

‘’Then make her listen,’’ Tony tells him, and there are shadows in his eyes that do not come from merely exhaustion. ‘’You’re a sorcerer. Surely you can figure something out.’’

Stephen can only nod quietly and wonder at how it will all fall apart.


	3. Chapter 3

The days trickle by, and Tony only becomes more aware of the fact how much has changed while he was sleeping.

He is slowly learning to walk again. He refuses to see anyone without Stephen Strange as protection, and Pepper has screamed at him over the phone for it. It had turned into a fight, and the fact that things are already falling apart when he’s only just returned hurts, but it would be worse if he hurt someone.

He is not sure if he could ever forgive himself if he hurt Pepper – or even worse, Morgan – while they were just sitting with him. He has seen the damage he can do, now, and he is not sure an innocent bystander would survive.

Luckily, Strange has proven to be an effective shield. Tony doesn’t know why the sorcerer listens to him and his wishes, but the fact is that he does. He doesn’t question Strange’s motives, though he secretly thinks that the sorcerer must have better things to do than hang around him for the better part of a day.

It takes him three days before he manages to convince Strange he should start walking again. Strange helps him out on the strict condition that he has a wheelchair with him, and he is so adamant that Tony has little choice but to listen to him. However, Tony also manages to annoy Strange into giving into some of his demands.

Which is how he finds himself at the new Avengers Compound – his first time out of the hospital. He hasn’t let anyone into his room, too exhausted with his attempts at regaining his strength and worrying about not exploding. Strange always watches him and helps him along, eyeing him curiously at some moments and making notes. Tony has never asked what he has noticed, but going by the many frowns, he thinks there are some things about his condition that may not match up.

Apart from the new powers, that is.

The new building is sleek and modern. Tony rolls himself further into the entrance hall, eyeing the Compound curiously. There is a desk, but no one is sitting there currently – perhaps they’re closed, even though it’s a weekday. Stephen joins him from behind, closing the portal they came here with.

‘’Where is everyone?’’ Tony asks. He tries not to be anxious about how he hasn’t seen anyone but Strange in three days, since his last accident. Strange may have succeeded in stopping him from hurting anyone last time, but he also said that it almost overpowered him: perhaps next time they won’t be as lucky. Tony is just afraid to hurt anyone – but he wants to see his friends.

‘’They’re waiting for you,’’ Strange says, and there’s that frown again. ‘’Here, it’s just the room next to this one. I thought it best not to immediately enter – I’ve had varied reactions to suddenly appearing out of nowhere. Tony, are you sure you are ready for this?’’

‘’I need to talk to them,’’ he answers resolutely.

‘’You shouldn’t pressure yourself,’’ Strange tells him, and he sounds remarkably gentle. ‘’They have waited for you for four years. They will not mind waiting a bit longer, if it helps you.’’

But Tony is already shaking his head. It has been but days and he is already uptight – he needs to get back in the game. Besides, he knows full well that Strange and Banner are the ones responsible for the research on how to heal him. He might be able to help soon – he is no expert on biology, but surely, he will be able to contribute something.

Strange takes his wordless answer for what it is and rolls him forward. Tony hates being helpless like this, but standing up is still a lot of effort. Walking is slowly getting easier, but he’d rather be rolled around than stumble and fall in front of his friends.

The wheels roll smoothly over the stone floor as Strange opens the door for him. Tony takes a final deep breath before rolling in.

The man on the couch catches sight of him first and rises, the expression on his face tender and anxious. ‘’Tony,’’ Rhodey says, and takes a single step. 

‘’Help me up,’’ Tony says to Strange, and he doesn’t care that he will exhaust himself. That is his friend right there, the man who has been beside him for years – ever since he was a teenager, lost by himself in the world. Strange doesn’t comment, taking his left arm as he gently helps him up.

It’s not a moment too late as Rhodey barrels into Tony, forcefully holding onto him. Tony just leans against him, trying to stand by himself as he tightens his grip on his friend. Rhodey’s hair is more grey than black right now, and there’s stark lines on his face that weren’t there before.

Age catches up much faster if you’re not there to see it happen.

Tony is just silent, closing his eyes as Rhodey almost holds him up, at this point. At least this is still familiar; it’s still Rhodey here, the first one to catch him.

‘’I wanted to come and see you, but Strange told me you didn’t want to see anyone,’’ his friend says, as he loosens his hold. His eyes rest on Tony’s shoulders, his dark eyes searching his face. Tony grimaces.

‘’I almost hurt Morgan,’’ he says, and even the thought makes him shudder. ‘’Rhodey, I can’t – I would’ve hurt her, if Strange hadn’t been there. It’s not safe to be around me. Maybe I shouldn’t even be here.’’

‘’Well, I’m really glad you’re here, Mr Stark,’’ a new voice says a bit shyly from the couch. Peter is looking at him, his hands clutching the pillows. Tony almost wouldn’t recognize him – how old is Peter now? He must be twenty, now. 

He stares at the boy – is he still a boy? – when he rises and comes closer. Rhodey lets go of Tony wordlessly and Peter takes his place instead. Tony doesn’t waste any time in clutching Peter tighter to him. ‘’You’re all grown up,’’ he mutters.

Peter’s arms around him are strong and secure – there’s biceps now, and a hint of a beard on his cheeks. The children have grown up, and Tony wasn’t there to see it.

‘’Not that much,’’ Peter says nervously. At least that hasn’t changed.

As Peter loosens him, Tony feels his own weight again. He almost buckles over, and Peter and Strange only just manage to catch him before he hits the ground. ‘’You shouldn’t try too much too soon,’’ Strange murmurs into his ear as they help him back into the wheelchair.

At least he doesn’t say it out loud in front of the whole room. Tony feels himself frown at his own weakness. ‘’You just like playing doctor, don’t you?’’ he says.

Strange shrugs. ‘’Doesn’t everyone who becomes one?’’

Fair point. Tony turns back to the room – everyone is still staring at him as if he is a ghost from the past. Maybe he is, to some. But everyone comes up to greet him, and something in his heart warms. Bruce, he has already seen before, but he’s there as well, sitting next to Sam and Wanda. Clint is sitting there as well, next to Scott, waving to him cheerfully.

More people are absent than there are present, however. Thor isn’t here, which he might have expected – he never thought the Norse deity would hang about Earth forever. But of the original Avengers team, only a few remain. He thinks about Natasha and feels a stab in his heart.

He lost her only days ago, in his mind. It’s still a sharp grief, and he doesn’t want to think about her too long. 

But someone else is also missing – someone he’d liked to have seen, after all their strife. ‘’Where is Steve?’’ he asks.

The room falls silent. Sam stands up, and his eyes are far too solemn for Tony’s liking. He takes a quick look at the others before nodding once and focusing on Tony again. ‘’Steve would’ve been overjoyed that you’re here,’’ he says quietly. ‘’He made a choice after the Battle. And I know he wanted to talk to you before doing it, but since he couldn’t – he’s not here, Tony. Steve passed away last year.’’

It’s like the world is standing still. Tony narrows his eyes, but the rest of the group isn’t responding, just looking at him. 

He had missed the death of one of his teammates. Someone he fought bitterly with – but someone who had his back, at the end of all things. Yet another Avenger, gone forever. The bitterness wells up, as does the grief. His relationship to Steve was complicated, but he thought they were friends, at the end. They were that, at least. And now he’s gone.

‘’Alright,’’ he says, and can’t help it if his voice sounds a bit choked. ‘’Did he –‘’

‘’Very peacefully,’’ Strange tells him next to him. ‘’He went back to a different timeline and lived out his life. He was an old man, and he was happy, Tony.’’

It doesn’t make it better.

Tony sits in his wheelchair and tries not to think about it.

~*~

‘’The Stones had a tremendous effect on your body – one we didn’t see before,’’ Bruce tells him, as he shows Tony the results of the various tests they did on him. Most of the graphs don’t mean anything to Tony, but he knows that some of the outcomes aren’t normal.

‘’Because it’s something we searched for very specifically after you woke up,’’ Strange explains, and points to one of the numbers. ‘’It seems like your aging has slowed down. You haven’t aged at all while in your coma – courtesy of the Time Stone, I presume. All the other Stones must have had an effect on your body, just so you could handle the power. The Power Stone may have made you stronger. I’m not sure you’re aware of it, but you are healing faster than is normal. We could have seen it in the way your scars faded after the Battle, but we didn’t expect – well, this.’’

‘’So you’re saying that using the Infinity Stones made me stronger?’’ Tony asks. ‘’Then why the hell didn’t I wake up earlier? If I healed so fast, why did it take four years? And why can’t I control this, if it’s part of me now?’’

‘’We’re only working with hypotheses right now,’’ Bruce says. ‘’Your body needed to get used to the strength and heal from what using the Stones did to you. The power they gave you needed time to settle. There are an infinite number of theories, and we may never know which is the right one. Biology isn’t mechanics, Tony – I don’t know why you woke up only now. I just know it’s a miracle you woke up at all.’’

‘’We will have to work on the control, however,’’ Strange adds.

Tony sighs and looks at Peter. The young man is sitting beside him, intently listening to all that Bruce and Strange have to say. He is still not sure how smart it is to let him stay, but he has missed Peter. He hasn’t seen him in years, and he wants to catch up, somehow. Besides, he’s old and wise enough to help. Peter is a prodigy and his insight may be helpful.

Maybe he just wants another friendly face here. He doesn’t know for sure.

‘’I don’t know if I can,’’ Tony says, and glances at his hands again. He remembers the way it felt, the powers building up inside him – tingling and burning. He does not know if it’s something he can help. ‘’Once it comes – I tried to stop it, the other two times. I don’t have a say in it.’’

‘’You may be too weak to control it,’’ Bruce says, though his face is doubtful. It is too much theory with too little confirmation. 

‘’You could try to see if it is triggered by something,’’ Peter suggest quietly, the first thing he’s said since he came along. ‘’If you can make sure it doesn’t come, you’ve fixed the problem.’’

Tony glances at him. There is truth in what he is saying, but he is still bothered by the issue. Even if he could make sure the powers don’t play up, there will always be a risk. And he cannot be around the people he cares about without a proper way to shield them from himself. Strange can’t be around him forever.

He needs an actual solution. ‘’We need to find out as much as we can about it.’’

‘’Well, we’re analysing more right now,’’ Bruce says. ‘’I’ve called some of the most gifted people in the world to work at this. People who don’t even have anything to do with biology, sometimes. Jane Foster is working on your problem as well – and she has some experience with the Reality Stone, so she might have some insight that we don’t.’’ 

‘’Thor’s old girlfriend?’’ Tony says, faintly amused. ‘’You’re really looking at this from all angles, aren’t you?’’

‘’You’re my friend,’’ Bruce answers quietly, and Tony falls silent. Bruce’s look is too worried and anxious for him to answer that. Bruce has lost just as many people as Tony has – Natasha, Steve. Probably he doesn’t have much contact with Thor anymore and Clint has disappeared from the superhero world. Tony was in a coma for four years and he isn’t necessarily out of the woods right now. And Bruce has always cared so much about all of them that he can’t even imagine what his friend must be feeling right now.

He tries to send a soft smile to Bruce, but doesn’t know how much it will help. His friend turns away, and it is still jarring to see the form of the Hulk so gentle and soft, especially when he can’t see Bruce’s face.

Strange stands next to him, a still figure looking at the screens. His face is illuminated in blue, making his pale face almost translucent. He is silent, his eyes taking in all the information available. His presence is calming, if only because he is the person Tony is least familiar with. No matter what happens, he won’t let Strange down, simply because they don’t know each other that well. Peter and Bruce may be hurting over his fate, but he doubts Strange cares overly much.

It’s obvious that he cares, of course, or he wouldn’t be here. But Strange will not look at him with that pitying look, trying to hide his conflicted emotions on Tony’s awakening.

‘’Maybe you should get back to the hospital,’’ Strange says eventually. ‘’We can do some more research, and I need to check on the Sanctum. Or if you’d rather stay –‘’

‘’No,’’ Tony says quickly. He cannot stay here without Strange – what if his powers play up again?

The sorcerer sends him an inscrutable look and Tony ignores him full out. ‘’Mr Stark, could I talk to you for a few minutes?’’ Peter asks, all of a sudden. His eyes are focused on Tony’s, something hesitant on his expression. ‘’Alone, I mean?’’

‘’Yeah, sure,’’ Tony says, surprised. He eyes Strange, asking a wordless question. Strange answers with a single nod.

‘’We’ll be waiting outside,’’ he says. Bruce closes the screens, joining Strange outside the room with only a single glance.

That means it is only Peter and Tony that are left in the room. The computers buzz quietly around them, and Tony taps on the right wheel of his wheelchair as he watches Peter. The young man bites his lower lip, looking away for a moment.

‘’I wanted to ask why you were meeting us here when you’re avoiding Pepper,’’ he eventually says. ‘’Mr Stark, I know you’re afraid of this – the powers are dangerous, of course they are, they come from the Stones. But you don’t know what we went through, the last few years, when you were – not here. She’s hurting, and I know you are, too.’’

Tony is silent for a few moments. Peter is just looking at him, and though he still looks so young, there is a determination in his eyes. The young kid he took under his wing all those years ago isn’t just a child anymore – and it’s time for him to get used to that.

‘’I don’t want to hurt her,’’ Tony says carefully. ‘’Or Morgan. And I don’t want to disappoint her. We have changed, both of us. And I need time to think of what we need to do.’’

‘’Don’t you think it’ll be easier if you just talk to her?’’ Peter offers.

So young, and already so wise. ‘’Maybe,’’ he acknowledges. ‘’When did you grow up?’’

Peter smiles softly. ‘’I’ve seen a lot of Pepper and Morgan the last four years,’’ he says. ‘’Aunt May wanted to help – knows a little about what it’s like to lose a partner and raise a kid by yourself, you know. And May and Pepper have grown really close. I don’t want any of you to be hurt.’’

Tony nods slowly. ‘’I’ll talk to them first thing tomorrow,’’ he says. He is getting tired of spending all day with other people, now that he isn’t used to it anymore. ‘’Can you roll me outside, kid?’’

‘’Sure thing, Mr Stark,’’ Peter says, sounding a bit relieved. He stands up easily. Tony wonders if the kid is taller than he is, now. He isn’t, in his memories. Peter gently takes the handle of the wheelchair, and Tony doesn’t mind letting him help. He thinks it may be good for the both of them.

‘’And stop calling me Mr Stark,’’ he adds as a last comment.

Peter just smiles.

~*~

Colonel Rhodes is waiting for him when he comes out of the hospital room. Stephen doesn’t show his surprise; instead he nods at the man, eyeing the severity of his expression.

‘’Doctor Strange,’’ he says.

‘’Colonel Rhodes. How can I help you?’’

‘’It’s about Tony.’’

Of course it is about Tony. He has been awake for less than a week, and Stephen is the one who has spent most time with him since then. It was not his own idea – and yet, he is the only one who can help Tony with his powers, for now. He feels a pressure to help, after everything that happened – on Titan, and in general.

The colonel’s dark eyes are fixed on his and Stephen nods. ‘’What do you want to talk about?’’

Rhodes straightens himself out, not looking away. ‘’These powers – they’re not going to go away, are they?’’

Stephen considers him for a moment. ‘’I doubt it,’’ he admits after a few seconds. ‘’They may remain a threat. But we have time to settle him back into his daily life – find out what makes the powers play up and control that. We have not been searching for a long time, Colonel. We may find a breakthrough.’’

‘’Bruce just got a text from someone who was checking out of one Tony’s tests,’’ Rhodes says, and his voice sounds grave. This time, his eyes fleet to the door to Tony’s room. The man is sleeping behind it, weary from his day getting back to his feet. ‘’We may not have that kind of time.’’

‘’What are you saying?’’ Stephen says sharply.

Rhodes shakes his head, his lips tightening. Stephen feels himself taking a step forward as the Colonel opens his mouth once again. ‘’We may not have time. The powers – they’re taking up too much of his energy. They saved his life, but they’re burning up too much of him.’’

Stephen sees right through what Colonel Rhodes is trying to say and yet, seemingly can’t. The man seems pained as Stephen processes his words.

‘’You think he’s ill. And that it’s going to get worse.’’

Rhodes grimaces. ‘’I don’t think he’s going to get better, unless we find a way to rid him of those powers.’’

‘’But we have so little experience with the Stones,’’ Stephen argues. ‘’There is too little knowledge to do anything about it – not right now, and not soon either.’’

‘’I can’t watch him wither away,’’ Rhodes says firmly. ‘’Not now we’ve got him back. So let’s find a solution, doctor.’’

~*~

When he wakes up, she is sitting there, her face like cracked marble. She is calm and composed, her eyebrows shapely and her lips painted a muted red. Her edginess is only betrayed by her slightly shaking hands, lingering over her lap.

‘’Pepper,’’ Tony croaks, and her eyes fly to his. She may have changed, but her eyes haven’t; they are the same blue as they always have been, equally deep and warm.

She doesn’t respond immediately, just shifting on her chair. ‘’Tony,’’ she says eventually, and then lays her hand on his, instead. He blinks himself awake, trying to sit up. He already feels better than he did before, as if his strength is slowly returning to him.

‘’Where is Strange?’’ he asks. ‘’Why are you here, alone? Pepper, I’m not –‘’

‘’I don’t care if you don’t think you’re safe to be around,’’ she interrupts him sharply. ‘’I have been in more dangerous situations before. I’ve been by your side while you were Iron Man for years. I’ve been infected with the Extremis virus. I have fought by your side, and I’ve seen you come closer to death than you’ve ever been. It’s not your job to protect me, Tony Stark.’’

Her face is still devoid of feeling, and that perhaps is the biggest indicator that she is hurting. Tony feels his chest tighten, and clutches at her hand. He feels like a fool, sitting in this white hospital bed, useless and meaningless. ‘’If I hurt you,’’ he starts, ‘’I wouldn’t forgive myself. Because all I’ve ever done is try to protect you. I was going to talk to you, Pepper. I promise.’’

‘’I know,’’ she says. ‘’Peter told me.’’

The monitor isn’t beeping anymore. Tony misses its sound, all of a sudden, as he can only hear his and Pepper’s breathing now.

‘’I know things are different now,’’ Tony says, and tries to ignore the way his heart tries to claw its way out of his throat. ‘’I know you’ve gone without me for four years. I know it’s not going to be like it was before. But I need to know how you feel.’’

She takes a deep breath, and it comes out again as a shudder. ‘’I don’t know, Tony,’’ she says miserably. ‘’I need time.’’

‘’You’ve had four years,’’ he tries. ‘’Pepper –‘’

‘’I didn’t think you’d ever wake up,’’ she snaps, and draws back as she pales. ‘’I’m sorry – Tony –‘’

‘’ _I_ didn’t think I’d wake up,’’ Tony intervenes, and wishes he could get out of bed. Wishes he wasn’t in a hospital, so he could hug her. Wishes he’d never fallen in a coma, so he didn’t have to have this conversation.

But they both deserve this. They need this, more than that.

‘’Four years is a long time to wait,’’ she whispers, and now a tear rolls on her cheek. Tony isn’t near enough her to wipe it off, and doesn’t know whether he should even if he could. ‘’I’ve met someone, Tony. And I wish I could say I hadn’t – wish I could turn this off – wish this would be different. But waiting for someone when you don’t believe they’re coming back – it takes more strength than I had.’’

Tony turns away, her words echoing in his ears. _I’ve met someone_. Pepper isn’t his anymore; all the years, and she’s gradually turned away from him. She has met someone, and that means – what? She isn’t going to be with him anymore.

And she may have had four years to move on, but Tony hasn’t.

‘’You need to leave,’’ he simply says. He needs time for this. He knows he’ll deal with this heartbreak like he’s dealt with all pain in his life, but for now, he needs to be alone. He loves her, he’s loved her for years, and he will forgive her in the end. He knows he will, because she’s Pepper, and she’s his world.

But for now, there is a hurt in his chest that cannot be soothed by her. Not anymore.

‘’Tony –‘’

‘’I need you leave. Now,’’ he stresses.

She takes a deep breath and rises from her chair. As she stands, it scrapes backward. The noise breaks the silence for only a few seconds; afterwards, the tapping of Pepper’s heels takes over. 

Tony closes his eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

There is something resembling normalcy in the days that follow, but Tony knows it’s all just pretend. Everyone is faking their smiles when they see him – he knows their gazes follow him in worry, and he wants it to stop. He is getting better, and yet everyone seems to think he’s on his deathbed once again.

Bruce told him about his test results the day after Pepper had left. He hasn’t spoken to her since, and that may be for the best – he needs his time, and he wouldn’t be able to handle dealing with her. He is strong enough to walk by himself again, if he doesn’t try too much too soon, and he isn’t as pale anymore. He can shave himself again, and the return of his facial hair feels a bit like returning to himself.

And yet there is the knowledge that there is something different under his skin, now. The reason he is alive, and perhaps the reason he will die.

No one has said it like that, of course. But everyone knows.

He hasn’t had an attack since that day in the hospital. Tony has discharged himself from the hospital – with only minimal struggle from anyone else – and has taken up residence in one of the rooms in the new Avengers Compound. He’d picked one in the west wing where no one else stays, too conscious of the damage he can inflict. When Strange is not around, Tony locks himself up. He’d try to keep his bots there, but well – he doesn’t want to harm them. It’s a bit lonely, but he can call up Morgan sometimes, and they both pretend they’re not crying when they talk.

He misses her so much, and the fact that he still can’t hoist her up and hug her as tightly as he wants to – well, it burns in his chest. But she talks to him about her day, and about how she is doing in school, and the friends she has made. She tells him funny stories about Peter, who has become like a brother to her, and how well she is doing on the swimming team. And it helps, even if Tony can’t tell her a lot about himself in return. He’s happy to hear about her, however, and she seems to be overjoyed to just be talking to him. She never asks to come, and Tony doesn’t offer – maybe she knows that he is too afraid he will hurt her, even if Strange is here.

He and Strange have come to a wordless agreement. He comes around every day, though the times vary. Only when he is there, Tony will join the others. He’ll sit with Bruce and Rhodey while they argue about ideas – he doesn’t know what to bring in, though. All the options they come up with – all the solutions they want to try, and the medication they consider – none of it will work. 

He is sitting there right now, silently watching the others talk about the powers running in his veins. Peter promised to come by later, and Tony wishes the youth was already here to distract him from all the medical talk. Rhodey isn’t a doctor either, but that doesn’t dissuade him from making suggestions. 

‘’Is there really no way to simply destroy the power?’’ he asks. ‘’They are just cells, right? If we carefully –‘’

‘’I doubt that would work,’’ Bruce shakes his head. The light of the screens is reflected on his glasses, and he pokes them up with one big green finger. ‘’Even if we managed to destroy it – and I doubt we would, because this isn’t exactly standard human biology we’re dealing with – there’s no saying what that would do to Tony’s body.’’

‘’But they are hurting him,’’ Rhodey says.

‘’And yet, he may not be able to live without them anymore,’’ Strange says, glancing at Tony. ‘’We appreciate the input, but –‘’

‘’So what can we do, exactly?’’ The colonel stands up, and Tony watches his friend pace around the room. ‘’We’ve been sitting here for days, only ever checking Tony’s results and coming to the conclusion that nothing we’ve thought of will help! That’s not an acceptable outcome, alright?’’

‘’Rhodey –‘’ Tony starts, but Rhodey turns to him.

‘’I’ve been mourning people for nine years now,’’ he says. ‘’We spent five years trying to figure out how to save the world. Then I had four years to see you wasting away in a bed when you deserved so much more. We’re surrounded by the smartest people in the world, and yet I’m only told that we can’t remove what is causing you to get ill. And you’re not saying a word.’’

‘’I don’t know what you want me to say,’’ Tony says, and rises. ‘’Do you think I’m happy like this?’’

‘’I think you don’t realize how many people mourned you,’’ Rhodey snaps. ‘’Pepper, Morgan, Peter, me – and you’re once again locking yourself away to solve everything by yourself. Once again, the classic self-destructive act – there are people who want to stand by your side and you turn them away! You can’t do this all by yourself –‘’

‘’Why do you think I’m here?’’ Tony says, balling his fists as he stares at the man. ‘’You think I’m keeping away because I don’t want to see you? You think I’m trying to solve this by myself? I’m not trying to solve anything, Rhodey – you know why? Because I don’t know what to solve. I’m tired of fighting to save my life, alright? And I’m tired of hurting other people along the way! We can’t get this out of me, and we can’t destroy it, and I don’t know what to do!’’

‘’You invented time travel!’’

‘’Does that mean I’m supposed to solve everything?’’ Tony knows he should not be shouting at his friends, but perhaps it is not something he can stop anymore – maybe he has lost all control, not just over any powers he may have, but over his entire body. The anxiety cuts him like a knife, but he sees red, and he can’t stop. ‘’Want me to find a cure for cancer, maybe? Want me to make sure nothing bad happens ever again, in the meantime? I tried, Rhodey! I tried, and I’ve never been able to save everyone!’’

‘’This isn’t helping anyone,’’ Strange says, laying a hand on Rhodey’s arm as he finds his way in between them. The Cloak he always wears rustles uneasily, and Tony hates him, all of a sudden. Hates the memories of Titan, hates that Strange relied on him to sacrifice himself to save everyone. Hates how in control he is – how above it all he is, and how he pretends to care.

Tony takes a step forward to shove the sorcerer away. Strange doesn’t even stumble – just takes a step back, watching Tony as if he is a caged animal. His light eyes rest on Tony’s, calculating with a tinge of worry. And that only makes it worse.

‘’This wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for you,’’ he says to the sorcerer, and he almost trembles though his voice is low and calm. ‘’You saw all of this, five years before it happened. You knew, and you decided that it had to happen this way – this is all of your making.’’

‘’Tony, you have to calm down,’’ Strange tells him, his hands are lifted in a defensive gesture, his palms turned outward. 

‘’I don’t have to do anything,’’ he hisses. ‘’I never asked for this – aren’t you supposed to be the best doctor in New York? Aren’t you the leader of the damned sorcerers, whatever they are supposed to do? If there was anyone who could fix this, shouldn’t it be you? And yet, you’ve done nothing. Nothing but bring me into this mess, and pretending you can help me out of it again. And guess what? You _can’t_.’’

‘’I’m sorry,’’ the sorcerer says – his voice is gentle and low. ‘’I am truly sorry, Tony.’’

It is not sympathy that makes Strange come back here day and day, Tony realizes – it is guilt. It is a feeling he is overly familiar with, and he can see it painted in the shine of Strange’s eyes. It is guilt and doubt and wanting to right wrongs. It is like looking into a mirror, and he stumbles back like he is the one that was hit instead.

He runs before he is even aware his legs are moving, his muscles screaming at him at the effort it takes to get moving. But once Tony starts racing down the hallway, it is hard to stop. He pushes past the few people he finds, ignoring the cries of his name behind him. There is too much inside him – and he runs like he can get away from his own mind, from his own doubts, his own past and his own future.

He runs like a man running from himself, still trying to deny the world will always catch up.

The rain is falling on his head and his shoulders when he stops running. Tony pants, leaning against a wall as the dizziness makes it hard to keep standing upright. His breath doesn’t come easy to him, and there is a dull pain starting in his chest. For a moment, he shudders, wondering if he is having trouble with his heart again. Somehow, that thought is a comfort – that is a pain he knows, a problem that he has dealt with before. 

He would rather have a familiar pain than this new one, even if it hurt ten times more.

But the universe has a funny sense of humour. Tony sags to the ground in exhaustion, his legs giving out below him. His breath comes in wheezes, now, and he stares at his hands at they hold onto the outside wall. The rain is still falling, cooling him down as his jeans get dirtied by the mud below him.

‘’Tony!’’ he hears over the buzzing sound in his brain – it sounds like coming from far away, but when Tony turns, Rhodey is far closer than he would have believed.

And Tony’s hands are glowing a fiery red.

‘’Get away,’’ he tries to get out, but his voice isn’t cooperating, and he can’t hear if he actually says anything. Rhodey just stares at him uncertainly, his eyes growing bigger as he takes in Tony’s state. He takes one step closer while Tony takes a deep breath, trying to control himself.

Strange said he should try to control this. If there is ever a time to learn, this is it. Rhodey is still coming closer, and he should leave – if Tony hurts him, he will never forgive himself – if he –

Breathing becomes harder and harder as the noise continues. The pain spreads through his whole body, his veins on fire and feeling like a thousand needles piercing his skin. He cannot control the shaking as he loses grip on the wall, falling entirely to the ground.

He doesn’t know when he closed his eyes, but when he opens them, Rhodey is still there – reaching for him, always trying to help him.

Tony lets out an inhuman scream, and lets go. A blast of red, intermingled with five other colours, comes from him, and the world doesn’t even have the decency to go black as Tony loses consciousness.

The rain falls on two fallen bodies.

~*~

‘’Tony is the only one who’d manage to blow up the lab even when he isn’t in it,’’ Banner says – it sounds like a joke, but his voice is dry and solemn, even as he stares at the man.

Tony is fine, mostly – some scrapes on his hands and arms from when he’d fallen, but those will not pose a problem. Especially not with the powers running through him, making sure he heals at a faster rate. Rhodes is a bit more injured, though it could have been worse. Far worse.

Stephen had been just a bit too slow, and he curses himself for it right now. When Tony had run out, he didn’t know whether to follow or to stay. The colonel had followed at once, and it hadn’t been until a few fateful seconds later that Stephen decided to follow, just to see if his help was needed.

It had been needed, and he’d been too late.

Fortunately, Colonel Rhodes had realized quickly enough that he needed to get away. Or well, quickly – he’d realized before the blast coming from Tony would have killed him or injured him even further. He’d ran fast, and his worst injuries are a hit to the head and a scraped back. He will have a few bruises to show for it later, however.

At least Tony hadn’t blown up the small resting room that was built into the Compound. Stephen had teleported them here easily after he found them and checked up on them.

‘’We need to find a solution,’’ he says, taking a look again at Tony’s pale face. The man may be healing in all ways but one, but they cannot keep him going like this. The powers seem to be triggered by emotional outbursts – or at least, he is starting to think they are – and he can hardly ask the man to stop _feeling_. 

‘’What were you under the impression we were doing?’’ Banner says, but he is wringing in his own hands nervously. ‘’The powers are pretty much latched onto him, Stephen. Unless we find a successful way of eliminating them, there’s not much we can do.’’

Stephen knows all of that. They simply don’t have a way to help Tony – they can only try and help him get his powers under control, perhaps. But he does not know if Tony still wants his help, despite him perhaps needing it. They have been searching for a cure for days, and with them the best scientists and doctors in the world – most unaware what they were looking for, but looking nonetheless.

‘’I know,’’ he says. ‘’Our world is not skilled enough to help Tony. Not yet, anyway. We are limited by our technology, and we do not know enough about the inner workings of the Stones and what they did to Tony when he used them. Now that the Stones are gone, only their effects remain. And I’m not sure Earth can help out.’’

Bruce turns to him. ‘’Are you saying what I think you’re saying?’’ he asks sceptically.

Stephen sighs. ‘’Do we have some contacts off Earth that may be able to help?’’

‘’I didn’t maintain those contacts,’’ the scientist mutters. ‘’I could probably call Thor – he’s off with the Guardians.’’

He frowns. He remembers the Guardians vividly from their encounter on Titan. ‘’I’m not sure they’re the best option,’’ he says carefully. ‘’They don’t seem very – how do I say this politely – scientifically inclined.’’

‘’They’re idiots,’’ Bruce agrees wryly.

‘’They are not our only option.’’

Bruce frowns. ‘’I know who you’re thinking off, but that may be a long shot.’’

‘’Everything we’re doing is a long shot,’’ Stephen says. ‘’We are still in contact with her, aren’t we? Maybe she has some answers. She has some experience with one of the Stones as well, I believe.’’

‘’We have plenty people on Earth who have experience with the Infinity Stones,’’ Bruce points out.

‘’But we do not have a lot of people who were granted powers because of Stones,’’ he says, and does not mention Wanda Maximoff. She is the clear exception – and she is helping out in other places, having stepped away from the Avengers to deal with the loss of Vision. Besides, she does not know anything more about the origin of her powers than any of them do. ‘’Bruce. It’s worth a try.’’

He nods slowly. ‘’We can try.’’

~*~

The Compound is dreadfully silent. Stephen does not spend much of his time here – or at least, he didn’t use to, before Tony woke up – but even he knows that this is out of the ordinary. The usual staff is quiet and withdrawn, aware of the circumstances. Stephen didn’t tell anyone what happened, but words must have gone around about the lab that was blown up.

The world knows that Tony Stark is awake, but they’d made sure that nothing about his new powers was out. Still, that is only a matter of time. Someone who knows a little too much will blabber, and the newly-awakened man will make headlines once again.

Tony is drawn. Stephen thinks he is still tired – there is a particular sharpness to Tony’s face that indicates tension more than alertness. The man has been mostly silent ever since he woke up, his mouth a tight line.

Perhaps he is worried about his own powers. Perhaps he is not feeling well. Perhaps Stephen should have tried harder to stop people from coming in.

Pepper Potts sits opposite Tony. She looks equally tense; her eyes are dark, her brows eternally furrowed. Her guilt shows plain on her face, but so does her worry and helplessness. Peter Parker sits beside her, but he looks more determined. Stephen doesn’t know him well enough to say if that is his character, or if it is his age that makes him so strong-minded.

He remembers the two of them on the battlefield, seconds after Tony had survived the Snap. He remembers the trembling of Peter’s voice, and he remembers the dust in Tony’s hair, resting on Pepper’s lap. He remembers the tension and the hope, and he thinks that none of them could have known where they would be in four years. Tony remembers none of this – Stephen wonders how much the thought of Thanos still bothers him. How much he hates the effect the Stones had on him – how much he thinks about it. If he ever stops thinking about it.

Stephen certainly has a hard time putting the memories to rest, even the ones of nine years ago, when he had first met Tony. He remembers seeing countless options, and seeing Tony give up his life in all of them. He knows exactly what demons Tony may be struggling with – and he cannot blame the man for lashing out at him, before. Stephen set them on this path, and now he has to deal with the consequences.

Tony hasn’t looked at him yet, ever since he woke up. Stephen can’t blame him for that, either.

Colonel Rhodes is the only one who seems willing to break the silence.

‘’Carol Danvers hasn’t been in touch with us for three months,’’ he points out, in response to Bruce telling him what he and Stephen had discussed earlier. ‘’She has her own ideas about pretty much everything.’’

‘’I thought you were friends,’’ Bruce says.

‘’We were,’’ Rhodes says, and tilts his head. ‘’We are. But she isn’t our most reliable supporter.’’

‘’She has valuable knowledge,’’ Stephen says. ‘’It may be our only option.’’

‘’We haven’t been looking for that long,’’ Tony says quietly, and this time he looks up. His eyes are almost golden in the sunlight, and they rest on Stephen. ‘’I’ve always managed to save myself so far. I made the arc reactor when I got injured. I created a new element when I had palladium poisoning.’’

‘’All of those, however serious, were problems to be found on Earth,’’ Stephen says, and he cannot help but hear the voice of sharpness in his tone. ‘’The Infinity Stones are one of a kind, Tony, you are well aware of this. And if memory serves, Danvers saved you before.’’

Tony flinches – almost imperceptibly, but he does – and he turns away. ‘’Let her help you, if she can,’’ Pepper says. ‘’Tony, I know you’re mad at me. You have every right to be. But you have a daughter who loves you, and there’s a life waiting for you. I’ve been beside you in a lot of ways, over the years. And I don’t want to lose you.’’

‘’You can call her, at least,’’ Peter adds. ‘’It doesn’t mean you have to stop trying to find your own solutions.’’

Rhodes crosses his arms. ‘’I’ll call her,’’ he says. Stephen wonders what changed his mind. The colonel has a bruise on his cheekbone from when he fell, and yet he hasn’t said one word to agitate Tony. He has good friends, at least.

Tony just sits still, not raising a word against the idea again. His quietness is making the others uneasy, Stephen can see. The man is just playing with his hands, his expression grim and closed. And if his friends are not getting through to him – who will? Stephen turns away.

He can see Pepper doing the same.

~*~

Tony locks himself up for the remainder of the day. His thoughts are sluggish and slow, and his body is even worse. It feels like he’s been hit by a bus, his muscles sore and aching. His own aches do not linger much on his mind, however; it’s Rhodey’s injuries that bother him more.

Rhodey, who has always been Tony’s staunchest supporter. His friend has been there since his MIT days – he’d been there when he’d been drinking too much, he’d been there when he’d picked up every blonde he could find. He’d been there through Tony’s sleep-deprived binges – he’d been there the day Tony had made Dum-E and they had laughed together at the clumsy robot’s first movements. Rhodey had been there the day that Tony heard his parents had died, and Rhodey had held him in his arms as Tony wept.

Rhodey had been there when Tony came back from Titan, broken and angry and desperate. Rhodey had been there when they’d found out that Pepper was pregnant, and Tony hadn’t known how to feel. He’d been there in the years after that, when Tony had learnt to be a father and live with the grief in his chest. 

Rhodey has always been there. Rhodey has been here since he woke up, trying his hardest to save Tony’s life. And today, he’d lashed out. And Rhodey had come after him, trying to be there once again –

And it had almost killed him.

Tony cannot do this. He is too much of a danger to be around. Even Strange’s presence is no guarantee that he will be safe to be around.

For the first time since he woke up, he wonders if it wouldn’t have been better if he had died, using the Stones. After four years, people have moved on – and here he is, dragging them back into his own problems. They would be safer without him around.

And yet, he can’t fully believe it. He still has a chance here, no matter how small: a chance to see Morgan grow up, a chance to reconcile with Pepper, even if she doesn’t love him anymore. A chance to watch Peter grow into the good man he will be, and to get back into the world. 

Determined, he claps his hands. The lights in his room go on; FRIDAY still manages the Compound, even after all these years. She remains silent as a screen appears before Tony, and he watches it.

‘’There has to be a way to fix it,’’ he mutters to himself. ‘’What do you do, when you find yourself with powers you don’t want to have? You don’t get rid of them – we can’t, right? Bruce tried to get the Hulk out of him for years, but he eventually accepted it. But what if the powers are destroying too much of the host – then we have to make the host stronger, so he can take it. So I won’t die, and can control it. But that requires a bit of a boost. So maybe we don’t get the powers out of me – but let something else go in.’’

He sits up straighter, frowning as he goes over the options. There are several things he can do, but not all choices are viable or safe. Besides, there is no guarantee any of it will work. He may just end up even sicker than he already is – he does not know enough about his own biology when he has to factor in the powers he got from the Stones. Mixing it with something else may only make him that much more dangerous.

If he truly thinks this may help, he has to talk about it with Bruce – and probably Strange. He owes Strange an apology, anyway. The sorcerer had not reacted much to Tony’s accusations, but he knows that he may have been too cruel. 

Despite knowing that, he still feels a bit bothered. They would not have won against Thanos without Strange, and he remembers that day on Titan as if it were yesterday. The look of defeat in Strange’s eyes and the desperate grip he had on Tony’s arm; it can all be explained by what he saw. He cannot even imagine how much trouble Strange may have had setting them unto this path, and yet. The sorcerer had sent him to this fate. It was all for the good of the world, and Tony cannot hold it against him, in good conscience.

It is a bit harder to forgive him for the consequences Tony has faced, however. Strange did the right thing, but Tony has to live with this, now. And he does not know how much of this Strange knew – but he saw the guilt in the sorcerer’s face, both in the lab and back on the battlefield. That battle is only days ago in Tony’s mind, and he remembers clear as day.

No, Strange was right to do what he did. Tony just doesn’t particularly like what he had to do.

Grimly determined, Tony starts browsing through his options.

~*~

Stephen is exhausted; he has been sleeping badly for days, tormented in his nightmares by memories of the war against Thanos. He has had four years to move past this, but Tony’s awakening and recurrent trouble had made everything come back sharply.

If he asked, they would probably let him go. Only Rhodes and Pepper are still there, and Stephen knows well enough that they are Tony’s oldest friends. They do not ask the same loyalty of him – he has seen either of them look at him oddly enough for even being here so often. He is just glad they have never asked why Stephen cares so much; he isn’t sure he’d be able to explain it very well.

‘’Did she answer?’’ Pepper asks. Her ponytail is messy and there are shadows under her eyes. Stephen thinks she may not have been sleeping too well today, either.

Rhodes shakes his head. His posture is stiff. Stephen might believe it has to do with his newly-acquired bruises, but it may just be that the colonel is tired and anxious. All of them have been sitting here for hours, discussing the situation. Much of it had been a repeat of things already said, however. There is not much to do but wait. Bruce and Peter had already left, leaving them with only three.

‘’She must be too far away to leave a message,’’ Rhodes says tiredly. He leans against the desk, playing with a cactus that stands before him. ‘’I still managed to contact her with the pager, but I don’t know when she will be here.’’

‘’That one is for emergencies, is it not?’’ Stephen asks.

Rhodes nods. ‘’She’ll answer – I know she will.’’

There is not much that Stephen knows about Carol Danvers. He had seen bits and pieces of her, back when he’d watched the future on Titan, but he has perhaps talked to her only once or twice before she left to go back to save other planets. He is aware that the ones who had not been dusted for five years know her slightly better, and Rhodes perhaps in particular. 

‘’Tony may not want to listen to anything she has to say,’’ Pepper tells them. ‘’Rhodey, you know how he gets.’’

‘’You can convince him,’’ Rhodes answers.

A clock strikes, somewhere on the other side of the room. Another hour has passed, and Stephen burrows himself into his Cloak. ‘’I don’t know,’’ she shrugs helplessly, a wry smile playing around on her face. Her voice is a mix between something cold and desperate. ‘’I don’t know if Tony will listen to me. He told me he needed time, and I didn’t listen to him. Things aren’t like they were.’’

‘’He will listen to Peter,’’ Stephen says.

Rhodes and Pepper share a look. ‘’That might work,’’ the man realizes slowly. ‘’Peter can convince him, if he’s on board.’’

‘’This is all assuming that Miss Danvers actually can help,’’ Pepper reminds them. ‘’What if she can’t? Or if she doesn’t want to?’’

‘’If she doesn’t want to, I’ll convince her,’’ Rhodes says resolutely.

‘’And if she can’t,’’ Stephen adds quietly, ‘’we’ll keep searching. We cannot worry about it until she gets here – and even then, she might not have all the answers at once. Searching for a remedy takes time.’’

‘’Time that Tony might not have.’’

‘’Don’t think like that, Pep,’’ Rhodes answers and he rises from where he’s sitting to help her up. ‘’We still have time enough to figure out a way to help him. Bruce confirmed that he has at least a year, maybe even more. And you know Tony – no one ever gets him under. No matter what happens. Hey, shouldn’t you go home, maybe? Check up on Morgan. Go to bed. I’ll handle Carol when she arrives.’’

Pepper doesn’t meet his eyes, releasing his hands as she also stands. ‘’Morgan is staying over at May’s right now,’’ she says.

‘’Maybe you should stay over at her place as well,’’ Rhodes tries. ‘’Pepper, you know –‘’

‘’Not when Tony’s here,’’ she interferes, and then glances at Stephen. She twitches, her mouth tightening imperceptibly. ‘’Doctor Strange –‘’

‘’Your own business is your own,’’ he says immediately. May – he knows enough to be cognizant of the fact that she is Peter’s aunt. He had been faintly aware that May and Pepper had grown closer to each other after the Infinity War, but he had not known it was to such a degree. Anyhow, he means what he is saying. Her relationships are her own business, and he does not mean to interfere.

Her smile is brusque but sincere enough, paired with her exhaustion. ‘’Thank you,’’ she says. ‘’Rhodey, let me know how it goes. If Tony, at any point, asks for me –‘’

‘’I got this,’’ the colonel says, and takes her hand one more time before he lets go of her. They are more than just Tony’s friends; they are allies, bonding over their love for one man, but also caring about each other. There is an affection that only comes from knowing each other for a very long time, and Stephen is jealous for all of a second before the feeling fades.

They deserve their happiness – everyone does, with everything that has happened in the last decade. And he has Wong and the Sanctum, which is all that he needs. Even if it gets lonely, sometimes.

‘’I’ll take my leave as well,’’ he says. ‘’I will be back tomorrow.’’

‘’Thank you for your help,’’ Rhodes says, tilting his head. ‘’I’m serious, Strange.’’

He smiles faintly. ‘’It’s my pleasure,’’ he says. Pepper is already disappearing through the door; otherwise Stephen would have offered her a lift through one of his portals. She has barely said a word of goodbye, but he can hardly blame her. She has enough worries on her mind.

He only notices how dark it is in the room when the orange sparks of his portal illuminate Rhodes’ eyes. The shine is reflected in his eyes, and Stephen nods only once at him again before disappearing.

The Sanctum is silent as he enters. It is late – most of the sorcerers will be asleep already. The quiet buzzes in his ears, and he winces at himself as he takes the first step on the stairs. The Sanctum is by no means badly kept, but the slight noise of his steps bothers him when the rest of the building is completely quiet.

He uses the Cloak to float up the stairs, in an attempt not to break the silence. When he gets to his room, he feels silly for it.

The Sanctum is far too big and empty for it to make any difference whether he makes any noise or not.

~*~

There is a surprise waiting for him, the following morning. Stephen does not make it a habit to teleport into the middle of a building that is not the Sanctum. Common decency makes it hard to justify it, in his own opinion. Not all sorcerers are the same, but Stephen nevertheless always teleports just outside of a building and waits to be let in.

This time, Tony Stark is sitting against the wall outside, quietly flipping through a book. ‘’Tony,’’ Stephen says in surprise.

The man looks up. His lips twitch, as if even the forced attempt to smile doesn’t truly work out. ‘’Doctor Strange,’’ he says politely. 

‘’What are you out doing here?’’ he cannot help but ask.

Tony shrugs and closes his books. His eyes fall further back, where there is still a hole in the wall where he exploded. Within a second, his gaze shifts back and he puts his hands in the pockets of his dirty trousers, trapping the book between his arm and his body as he sits up straighter to look him in the eye.

‘’Had another accident last night,’’ he says, and Stephen can only now see the weariness he holds himself with. ‘’Figured it doesn’t really matter where I sit as long as there’s no people around. There’s only so much hiding I can do, doc. Besides, we have a visitor.’’

‘’Danvers?’’ Stephen asks.

Tony sniffles and looks back at the door. ‘’She is talking with Rhodey right now. About me, presumably. I don’t know if I want to be there – to hear.’’

There is something behind that, but Stephen cannot figure it out right now. Tony doesn’t seem eager to get back into the Compound, however, and that is fine. There is no hurry, no matter how many people seem to think that every second matters. Maybe Tony needs some time to sit down and unwind, without having to worry every minute about his continued existence. 

‘’Alright,’’ Stephen says. ‘’Then we don’t.’’

And with that, he sits down next to Tony. The man regards him silently for a few moments, but Stephen decides to ignore him and conjures up a book of his own. He pretends to read it even as he tries not to feel Tony’s lingering gaze. There are questions coming, he can feel it in the air, but he’ll wait for Tony to form them.

‘’Doc?’’

It’s somewhat of a nickname. Stephen hasn’t heard one from Tony before. ‘’Yes?’’ he says, still keeping his eyes on his book as he skips a page. It is a truly intriguing read, but he doubts he will be able to focus on it while he is sitting here.

‘’Why do you care?’’ he asks then. ‘’I mean – that’s not what I meant to say.’’

‘’Isn’t it?’’ Stephen smiles faintly and closes the book. Tony’s dark eyes are narrowed, trying to read him. Whether he is succeeding or not, Stephen does not know. ‘’You want to know why I am here, helping you?’’

‘’Yeah.’’

‘’I am a doctor, Tony. If I see someone I can help, I will try.’’

‘’That’s not all it is.’’

One can say many things about Tony Stark, but he is not a fool. Stephen sighs and puts away his book. He has had this conversation with Pepper before, when he hadn’t yet known he would ever have to talk about the same thing with Tony. ‘’You remember what I did on Titan? When I saw the possible futures?’’

It is hard not to remember, for Stephen. He remembers a million possible horrors, one even worse than the other, until there was one they won – but with a price. He remembers Tony’s hand steadying him afterwards, and somehow, that had made all of it even worse.

‘’I remember,’’ Tony says firmly, and Stephen thinks that he may remember other things about that day. Steadying a shaken sorcerer wasn’t the most traumatizing thing to happen to him that day, and he doesn’t even know if Tony remembers the small kindness he showed Stephen on that planet.

He can already see the darkness in Tony’s eyes – he doesn’t want to linger on any of those memories. ‘’I saw fourteen million ways that the conflict could end,’’ Stephen quietly says. ‘’There was no question of us stopping Thanos – we were too late for that. And getting back the Stones and winning again – also a very small chance. I ended up at the one way, the way we did this. But I saw a lot of other ways before that. It is difficult, Tony, to see a man struggling to win a war fourteen million times and not gain some respect.’’

Tony is slightly trembling next to him. Perhaps he is thinking about the Battle, but Stephen doesn’t want to upset him further by prodding. He ignores Tony’s discomfort, not sure what the courteous thing to do is; they’re not close enough for Stephen to comfort him. 

‘’But none of that was me,’’ Tony says.

‘’It could’ve been,’’ Stephen tells him. ‘’It would have been, had we done anything differently. It doesn’t matter, Tony. I saw the possibilities, and I saw what you were willing to do in everyone one of them – the same thing you did in here.’’

‘’Sacrifice myself,’’ Tony says quietly, his voice wry. ‘’But it didn’t work like that. Did you know?’’

‘’I didn’t,’’ Stephen says – only a few words, but enough to make the man aware. To make him know that Stephen, like everyone else, had thought Tony would die. And he’d sent him on this path anyway. He knows it was the only way, and yet. It’s difficult to tell a man you sent him to a future where he wouldn't survive.

Tony looks at him for one long second. ‘’You did what you had to do,’’ he says, and it is not quite an apology, but it isn’t anything else either. Stephen inclines his head to him; he understands the difficulty in the situation. Stephen brought them here, after all, even if he didn’t necessarily mean for it to be so. Even if he would’ve saved everyone, if he could.

He may be the Sorcerer Supreme, but even his powers are limited. They will all have to live with that.

‘’And I’ll do the same thing now,’’ he tells Tony.

The man’s smile isn’t sincere, but at least he tries. He gets up with some trouble, clearly exhausted by his late-night display of powers. Stephen wonders how bad it was, and if he destroyed something, but he doesn’t want to ask. If it was too bad, Rhodes will tell him later.

‘’We’ll see,’’ the man just says, and walks into the Compound. Stephen follows.

~*~

Danvers tilts his head at him when Tony enters. ‘’Stark,’’ she says neutrally. Her eyes are sharp and fleet to Strange when he comes in. ‘’Doctor Strange.’’

‘’Captain Danvers,’’ Strange says politely, and folds his hands together before him. ‘’Thank you for coming.’’

Tony wonders if the doctor ever loses his cool. He certainly isn’t interested in trying to provoke him, right now. He isn’t sure what to think about Danvers, if only because he doesn’t know her that well. She worked with Rhodey during the five years that half of humanity was gone, but Tony had kept away from the Avengers during that period. There is enough that he knows about her strength and her background, however, and she holds herself in a no-nonsense manner. He can respect that.

‘’Where’s Rhodey?’’ he asks before she can answer Strange.

‘’I’m here,’’ the man in question says, walking back into the room. Tony knows that Rhodey hadn’t slept at all last night, but one wouldn’t be able to tell it from looking at him. He sips contently from a cup of coffee, and the weariness in his eyes could be from nothing more than rising early.

Last night had seemed endless. Tony had woken up from a nightmare only to find his skin tingling with different colours once again. It had taken less than two minutes for him to blast through the room, scorching his bed and desk. His clothing had been ruined and his blast had set off the fire alarm, causing him to get wet as well. It hadn’t been great, and he’d felt the exhaustion settle in his bones after that. At least he hadn’t hurt someone this time.

No more than an hour after that episode, which had made Rhodey run to his room to help out, Danvers had arrived. Tony had left to try to sleep some more before he could explain anything to her, far too tired and ill to deal with it. He is not sure what Rhodey discussed with her, but he knows that there is a chance that his survival depends on her knowledge.

And that is a thought he isn’t fond of. He has always managed to save himself, before, and the fact that there are questions that he doesn’t have answers to – well, he wishes he never had to face a situation like that. And yet, here she is, the woman who has the power to make or break his future. He has his own solution, maybe, but he isn’t sure they will work yet. His research of last night was no confirmation of whether he already has thought up an answer to his problem. And if it isn’t, Danvers may be his only option left.

Rhodey’s grin is soft and relaxed, however, and Tony feels himself grow less tense. For his friend to be calm, the news has to be at least something positive. Maybe she can help him without Tony having to resort to dubious elixirs. He finds himself standing up straighter even as Danvers looks him over.

‘’I heard you woke up with some surprises,’’ she says dryly. ‘’The Infinity Gems gave you powers, right?’’

‘’That’s the theory, yes,’’ Tony says, sharing a look with Strange. He doesn’t know how much Strange knows about the woman – the sorcerer seems to have a habit for knowing stuff he shouldn’t, but perhaps he didn’t see her in his future. 

It doesn’t matter much, anyway. ‘’And you can’t control it?’’ she asks.

‘’It wouldn’t be a problem if I could,’’ he answers, unable to stop the bite.

‘’Tones,’’ Rhodey warns him, but Danvers just grins to herself, as if she is thinking of an inside joke only she knows. She shares a look with him, however, and Tony smiles.

‘’I got my own powers because of the Space Stone, but that’s only one of the Gems,’’ she continues. ‘’Dealing with six of them – I could see how that is a problem. And you need to get it out, James said.’’

‘’If it can be done.’’

‘’If it doesn’t kill him,’’ Strange adds sharply.

Danvers tilts her head, and her short hair moves with her as she takes a step towards him. ‘’I think, Tony Stark,’’ she says, the tease of a secret playing around on her lips, ‘’that I may be able to help you. I know exactly where to bring you to get that power out of you.’’

Tony’s heart beats loudly in his chest. ‘’Tell me,’’ he says.

‘’You’re not going to like the answer.’’

‘’I don’t much like having these powers either. Tell me.’’

Her eyes focus on his as she leans forward. ‘’It won’t be a safe trip, and it’ll take you away from home for a long time. But if there’s any place you can be helped, it’ll be there. Fortunately for you, there is a planet that holds many experts on many illnesses, and I’m sure they’ll have an idea that can help you. The downside is that it’s on the other side of the galaxy.’’

Tony takes a deep breath and looks to Rhodey. His friend is nodding at him, encouragement written all over his face. Back to space, after – no. He tries to hide his fear as he puts his hands in his pockets, where no one can see them tremble. He wishes he had sunglasses, even as he smiles.

‘’Thanks for the offer, but I think I’ll pass,’’ he says as breezily as he can, and turns the way from which he came.


	5. Chapter 5

The problem with hiding is that Tony is not overtly familiar with the newest Avengers Compound. He might have found a spot that no one else knew in his own Compound, the one that had been blown up four years earlier – even if he remembers the dust and pain so clearly, as the years are but days in his memory – but there is no possibility of that in this building.

Hiding is the best he can do, however, without putting others at risk. Not that any of the Avengers seem to care that Tony’s powers are capable of killing them, if they come too close. Or anyone else, for that matter.

It is Peter who comes to find Tony first – and that might not have been a problem, maybe, because Peter is a smart kid with a good brain, even if it doesn’t always show. The fact that he is holding Morgan’s hand is something else entirely.

‘’Dad,’’ she says, her voice small as she spots him.

Tony hid in one of the labs – there are a multitude of them, even forgetting the one he blew up from the outside. It’s smaller but functionable enough, however, and Tony feels himself tense as he hears her voice.

She may be four years older, but he’d know her voice anywhere. ‘’Hey, squirrel,’’ he says, trying not to choke on the words as she watches him from the door opening. Peter holds her hand tightly, and she seems uncertain about whether she is wanted here. Peter just looks at him, biting his own lower lip as an obvious question appears in his face.

‘’Tony,’’ Peter says, and this isn’t the first time he has used his first name. Tony recalls vaguely when he’d just used the Infinity Stones, unaware of what they’d do to him, and when he thought he was going to die. He remembers the boy’s voice, calling him by his name, so upset. It is a vague memory, overridden by the remembrance of the sharp agony in his bones and the fire burning through his veins – by the realization that he was going to die.

And here he is. Peter must see something in his face, because he takes a step forward and lets go of Morgan’s hand. The girl takes it as a cue to leap forward, and before he knows it, Morgan has launched herself into his arms, burying her head in his chest.

Tony trembles as he holds onto his daughter tightly, feeling her own arms holding onto his neck as if she would just break if he pushed her away. And perhaps he should – she is not safe with him, not anymore, not after everything he’d done to give her a safe world. The pain he would see in her eyes if he did, however, makes him halt.

He can have this, for a few minutes. Just hold onto her.

Peter joins the hug. He presses his chest against Morgan’s back and engulfs both Starks in his arms. It comes unexpectedly, but Tony moves one hand from his daughter’s back to Peter’s, to envelop them both. He loves them so much – the daughter of his blood and the son of his heart, and the reason he did everything to defeat Thanos in the first place. Everything he has ever done is because he would die to see them happy. To see them alive and breathing, and to see the sparks of joy in their eyes.

But Morgan is sobbing into his shirt, and Peter doesn’t seem far from doing the same. His eyes are pressed closed, but there is some wetness clinging to his lashes. Tony closes his own eyes as well so he doesn’t have to see it, and just holds them close.

Morgan smells of soap and metal, and he buries his nose in her dark hair. It takes a few minutes for them all to calm down, as Morgan’s sobs quieten. 

‘’You shouldn’t be here,’’ Tony mutters to the both of them, but tightens his hold. He is insane for letting them do this; he already had two attacks in one day, and there is no way to know when the next one is coming. He can’t stop it, and if he hurt the two kids – well, even the thought is horrifying.

Peter doesn’t let go either, and Morgan is sandwiched between them. She doesn’t seem to mind. ‘’I think this is exactly where we should be,’’ Peter says quietly. 

‘’I miss you,’’ Morgan mutters into his shirt. She is almost nine, now; and yet, there’s still a lot of the four-year-old girl that Tony left in her. He wonders how well she remembers him, and slowly releases her and Peter from his grasp to look at them.

Morgan’s eyes are red as she looks at him, and Tony presses a kiss to her forehead. ‘’I missed you too,’’ he says, and strokes her hair. 

‘’I don’t want to talk to you over the computer anymore,’’ she says, taking a deep breath. She seems to be on the verge of tears again. ‘’I want you to come _home_.’’

‘’I know, squirrel, I know,’’ he mutters, embracing her once again. Now he started, it seems he can’t stop. ‘’But I’m only doing this to keep you safe. You and your mom, and everyone else.’’

Peter shuffles a seat so that he can sit next to Tony. His eyes rest on Morgan for a while before he looks at him again. ‘’Doctor Strange told me what you’d told Carol,’’ he says quietly. Tony wonders when the boy started becoming so familiar with everyone. Did Pepper and Rhodey bring him further into the Avengers, or did he just refuse to let go? Did someone else mentor him, after? How many adventures has he faced without Tony to help him? How many horrors has he endured, and could Tony have helped?

Tony hums. ‘’And?’’ he asks, though his chest tightens.

Peter frowns at him. ‘’Why did you refuse?’’ he asks.

If Tony thought that Morgan was still the naïve child he left behind, he would be corrected, now. She once again tightens her hold – she squeezes so hard that Tony wheezes, worried his ribs might be bruised. She loosens her grip a little at that, but it is obvious she is listening intently. She must know what is going on, more than Tony thought she did; at least she seems to know that Tony refused Danvers’ offer.

‘’I’m not leaving again,’’ Tony says. ‘’I’ll find a way to fix it and stay on Earth. There has to be a solution that’s closer.’’

‘’What if there isn’t?’’ This time it’s not Peter who asks. Morgan looks up – seeing her eyes is like looking in a mirror. Long lashes, sticky with tears, frame her brown irises. There is a lot of Tony in her face, but her nose is all Pepper’s. Tenderly, he presses a kiss to it.

‘’That’s still a long way off,’’ he says. Bruce had given him at least a year – there’s a lot he can do in a year, even if things seem pretty hopeless now. He had solved the palladium poisoning pretty quickly, when he had figured that one out. It feels like a lifetime ago. Maybe it is.

Peter shifts in his chair. ‘’Morgan, can you get Rhodey for me? I need to talk to your dad for just a minute. I promise you can have him back after that.’’

It’s not a promise Peter should be able to make, but Morgan seems to trust him. With only the tiniest bit of hesitation, she lets go of Tony. She pouts at him a little, but Tony smiles encouragingly. With a last kiss to his cheek, she darts out of the room. Tony loves her so much that it’s hard to focus on anything but that for a moment, but he has to when Peter turns to him.

‘’You think I should go,’’ Tony says bluntly, not having to doubt for one second about why Peter sent Morgan away. 

Peter is old enough to take it, now. He nods quietly. ‘’I know you don’t want to go, Mr Stark,’’ he says, slipping back into old habits. Tony winces at his choice of words, remembering the boy slipping away from his grasp on Titan, and Peter grimaces as he realizes a second later. ‘’I’m sorry – it’s – I know. I wouldn’t be happy to go back into space, and for you – I understand. But you can’t just give up because it’s scary.’’

‘’Peter, I’m not giving up,’’ Tony insists, and he takes the young man by his shoulders. ‘’I promise you, I’m still searching for options. But going to space? That’s not going to happen. There’s no guarantee it will work, and I don’t want to be gone from home for so long for such a long shot. There has to be something on Earth that will help – maybe Strange will find something among one of those weird artefacts, who knows. I have a year. I’m not going to waste it.’’

‘’What if it works?’’ Peter shoots back, steel in his eyes. ‘’What if it’s the only thing that works? The trip wouldn’t take all year, and people could keep searching for solutions here. You’re not the only one that can solve problems.’’

Tony lets go of him and draws back a little. He does not want to go for space for all the reasons he just mentioned – and maybe a bit of fear. He used to want to be an astronaut, he remembers. Years and years ago, when Howard and Maria were still alive, and he’d had Jarvis to take care of him. 

If only he’d known, as a child. Space has never brought him anything good – it had been where he’d held the dust that used to be Peter. It was where he’d been stabbed and lost all hope that he had won this fight. Space is where he’d drifted, in the ship that he thought would be his coffin. He’d lost everything in space, and he doesn’t want to go back.

He already can’t sleep without having nightmares. He is certain he’ll go insane before he has spent a day on a space ship.

‘’I already thought of something,’’ Tony says. It’s not a lie, necessarily, but it implies that he may have a solution. And he is far from certain. ‘’I need to run it by Bruce first, but it might work. And that way, I won’t have to go into space at all.’’

‘’And what if that doesn’t work?’’ Peter says. There is a desperate quality to his tone. He may be a man, but in so many ways, he’s still a child. ‘’I don’t want to lose you, Tony. Not when we just got you back.’’

‘’And you won’t.’’

‘’So you’ll go?’’ Peter’s eyes shine with unbred tears and determination, and he tightly holds onto Tony’s chair to keep him right there. ‘’If your solution doesn’t work – you’ll go with Carol?’’

‘’You’re forgetting one very important thing,’’ Tony says. ‘’Spaceships, while very sturdy in essence, won’t survive me blowing them up accidentally. And we haven’t found a way to stop my blasts from coming, because only Strange has managed that so far.’’

Peter falls silent, and Tony can just hear his thoughts going a thousand miles an hour. He stands, suddenly feeling like the tightness on his chest is pressing too hard. Immediately, he glances at his hands to see if his powers aren’t acting up; but they are still their normal skin colour, and he takes a breath to calm himself down.

‘’What was your idea?’’ Peter asks him quietly – as if he doesn’t want to give himself hope. Tony should stop comparing him to who he was before. It feels odd to realize that it has been nine years since he went to Titan with him – Peter was gone for five of them, and then Tony for four. But with the number of times he has had nightmares about the kid dying in his arms, it doesn’t feel like it has been that long at all.

The Peter he thinks of would have jumped at Tony’s admission of having an idea. Would have had no trouble putting his faith in only him. But Peter is older and wiser, and Tony – well, Tony is only older. Peter may be fully aware that this is just Tony trying to get out of another trip to space, without anything substantial to back up his claims.

‘’Strange said it was dangerous to get the powers out of me, didn’t he?’’ Tony starts. At Peter’s slow nod, he continues. ‘’Even if we found a way to manage to do that, there’s no certainty that losing the powers wouldn’t kill me all by itself. So I can’t control it, and I can’t remove it – what’s left? Making sure that I’m strong enough to control them.’’

There is only the buzzing of machinery as a crease forms in Peter’s brow. He leans back, tapping with his fingers on his other arm. ‘’Can you?’’ he asks pointedly.

Tony shrugs. ‘’There’s been multiple ways to make someone stronger in the past. Bruce managed, even if the Hulk hasn’t always been so helpful. Steve and his super soldier serum is another example – and Barnes might come out to help, if we ask nicely. I still have a recipe for Extremis lying around that I was fiddling around with before – well, before. There should be something. I haven’t talked about it with Bruce yet, but it’s an idea. A starting point.’’

There is no time for Peter to reply as Morgan returns. Rhodey comes in behind her, his eyes falling on Tony when he sees him. Tony remembers when Morgan had been born: Rhodey had been the first to see her, after Pepper and him. He is her godfather, after all – she has grown so much bigger since then. He remembers the look on Rhodey’s face when he’d held her as a baby.

That day, his eyes had been soft and full of joy, despite the fact that they’d lost so many others not even a year, back then. Morgan had been a beacon of hope in the darkness. She still is, to Tony – he wouldn’t have made it the full five years without going insane, if she hadn’t been there.

Rhodey’s eyes aren’t as kind today. ‘’I found uncle Rhodey,’’ Morgan declares, crossing her arms. She isn’t going to leave now that she has done as asked – she tilts her head stubbornly, and Tony knows that look well enough. 

Rhodey walks towards them easily, putting a casual hand on Peter’s shoulder as he regards Tony. ‘’Have you finally stopped hiding?’’ he asks lightly, but there is something terse in his face that betrays his feelings.

Tony just shrugs. ‘’Guess I’m not very good at hide and seek. You’re not afraid I’m going to blow you up any second now?’’

That draws a quick grin from his friend. ‘’I got used to you blowing up things in college. These powers of you really aren’t impressive as you make them out to be – you’ve been doing this since you were a teenager.’’

It’s as much of an apology as they will ever have. Tony smiles as Rhodey helps him up. ‘’I know you want to yell at me about Danvers’ solution,’’ he says as he straightens himself, ‘’but just give me a few days. And get me Bruce. I have another idea that may make it completely unnecessary to make any trip to space at all.’’

The dark eyes linger on him for a few seconds. ‘’Alright,’’ Rhodey says eventually. ‘’But you have to promise to think about it, if your idea doesn’t work. And talk to Pepper.’’

Tony sighs. ‘’Yes, dad,’’ he mutters. Morgan smiles broadly and comes to hug him once again. Tony doesn’t have the heart to resist, even when fear grips him again. He needs this to work, or he'll never hold her again.

~*~

Stephen puts back the book on the shelf where he got it from, the blue binding vaguely worn from all the times it has been read. It did not have any of the answers he was looking for, however, though there were many interesting spells in it. For another time, perhaps.

‘’You may have assigned yourself to be Stark’s doctor, but I feel like you’re turning into his personal sorcerer as well. Have you considered that you are getting too invested?’’

The humour in the voice is double-edged. Stephen turns to face Wong, his arms full of books. Wong only glances at him for a few seconds before he starts to return his own manuscripts in their proper place, but Stephen knows that is friend is not ignoring him.

‘’He needs my help,’’ he says.

‘’Has he asked for it?’’ Wong puts back another book, ancient enough that it would fall apart if not handled with diligent care. His hands are always careful with their records – Wong knows spells that will fell enemies within seconds and battles like a burning angel when he needs to, but he has never harmed a single page. That is the life of a sorcerer, perhaps. Guard their wisdom and strive for peace, and yearn for hands that can remain gentle.

Stephen’s own hands are scarred. He has learnt to control the tremors, but he cannot handle books with the same tenderness that Wong does. Perhaps that says something about him as a sorcerer – perhaps he is reading too much into it.

He steps away from the books. ‘’Not explicitly. But that does not mean I will not give it.’’

‘’Stephen –‘’

‘’Wong,’’ he interrupts sharply.

The look his friend sends him is just as gentle – a wave smoothing over the rocks. They could have argued about this. Stephen knows that Wong has his doubts on what he is doing, but it does not matter. In the Sanctum, they look after each other.

‘’It is not your duty to save Tony Stark,’’ Wong reminds him quietly. ‘’You did not create this path for him. You _saw_ it, and that is a different thing. You did not force him to go this way and you did not ask him to sacrifice himself to save the world.’’

With a single nod, Stephen turns. Dozens of books lie before him – the secrets of the world. Or some of them, at least. There should be a way to help Tony, but if there is, he cannot find it. And he thinks someone would have said something before now. Perhaps he is trying to find something that does not exist.

‘’I know that those were his choices,’’ Stephen says. ‘’I know this was the only way. I do not regret it, Wong.’’

‘’Then why are you helping?’’

‘’Because I see a man in pain, and I am a doctor at heart. Because I see an illness without a remedy, and I can’t accept that. Because I may not be guilty, but I did set him on this path – I have always known he would be the one to carry the burden of consequences. Because there was no one else, and he did it willingly. I feel that I owe him, Wong. His choices led us to the end, but does that mean that we are absolved? Does that mean that we have done our task, and that’s it? We’re not responsible for what comes after?’’

There is a solution – a journey to the other end of the galaxy. It poses a number of problems, and Stephen had seen Tony run away after hearing it. Rhodes and Danvers weren’t there, that day on Titan. Stephen knows exactly why Tony had run – he can’t fault him for it. He has nightmares, too. Blood and dust and only one way to get back all they had lost. He had not known that it would work out – he had gambled on Tony’s bravery, and it had worked out.

He still dreams of futures where it hadn’t.

All in all, he does not believe Tony will go. The only chance he has at being saved is if Danvers herself goes to the planet and comes back with a solution or if they find something on Earth. He is uncertain about the first, but does not have much more faith in the second.

Stephen Strange is a doctor first and foremost. It does not matter what he believes – he will keep looking for a solution until the very end. He is tied to Tony’s fate in a way that the other sorcerers of the Sanctum may not understand. Perhaps it has been that way since Titan.

Wong nods. ‘’If that is what you think is right.’’

It is not just about that. Nonetheless, Stephen wears a faint smile.

~*~

Strange does not say much, as he sits surreptitiously in a corner. He had listened to Tony’s theories alongside Bruce, nodding along at the appropriate moments with a pensive expression. It is hard to know what he is thinking. Tony does not have the same problems with Bruce – there is a crease between his brow that means that he is uncertain about something. The fact that he keeps pushing up his glasses and exhaling nervously are glaringly obvious signs that he feels uncomfortable.

‘’You did this, too,’’ Tony points out. ‘’You made the Hulk to make yourself stronger. It may not have been what you wanted from it, but you succeeded.’’

‘’I doubt you want to become a green rage monster, Tony,’’ Bruce says. The weariness in his voice tugs at Tony’s heartstrings, for a moment. His friend has been working day and night to save his life – and here he is, talking about another crazy theory while turning down a viable option from Danvers. Everyone must have hoped that he would take that chance.

Even the thought of going to space is enough to make him panic. Tony has avoided having anxiety attacks since he woke up, and he would rather keep it that way. He is beyond certain that it would trigger another accident, and he has had enough of those already.

‘’If that’s the only way? I would.’’

Bruce’s mouth tightens, but to his credit, he doesn’t say bring up Danvers’ solution. ‘’Your body was not meant to store so much non-human material. I am not sure it would be able to deal with it.’’

‘’The Stones made you stronger,’’ Strange offers from where he’s sitting. His hands are folded over his lap, but he is staring intently at something far away. ‘’You might be able to take it. On the other hand, we are still largely unsure about the effects of the Stones – it would take years to research it fully.’’

‘’We don’t have that kind of time.’’

‘’Yes, I am fully aware. But we can hardly experiment on you. We cannot replicate the effect the Stones have had on you – we don’t have them anymore, and even then, I doubt it’s safe or advisable. Or ethical, for that matter. Adding other chemical fabrications to the mix might prove fatal to you – you are like a walking bomb. If we add something dangerous, who knows what is to happen?’’

Strange is looking directly at him, now. He is still in control, as he always is – but there is something beyond that façade, something Tony can only guess at. 

‘’I just want to hold my daughter without having to be afraid that I’ll blow up in her vicinity,’’ he says helplessly, gesturing. ‘’Is it too much to ask?’’

The silence in the room is answer enough. It may not be too much to ask, but it is certainly a lot. Life is not always fair, Tony knows that well enough. Still, he feels bitter. ‘’I have searched for answers in the Sanctum,’’ Strange starts quietly. ‘’Spells and potions to deal with the kind of power that the Gems have awaked in you are hard to find. Non-existent, perhaps.’’

‘’And yet, you’re the only one strong enough to put a shield around me,’’ Tony points out. ‘’Isn’t there _something_ you can do?’’

The sorcerer’s look grows pensive. ‘’You have a point – however, I am the Sorcerer Supreme. Strength relies on more than a spell – it relies on a user, and the combination of spell and power would allow us to deal with your illness. I can’t help you if nothing exists for me to use. But I can help with smaller difficulties. You destroy everything around you, don’t you?’’

‘’I’ve left multiple rooms with scorch marks, as well as my best friend,’’ Tony replies sarcastically. Strange raises an eyebrow at him, but does not rise to the bait. 

‘’I read a book to see if there was a way to shield you from yourself without my intervention. I couldn’t find anything powerful enough, but perhaps there is a way to shield some of your possessions. Your clothes, perhaps – but those are minor matters.’’

Tony regards him for a moment. Strange just looks back, unperturbed. He does not know the sorcerer that well, but he remembers their first meeting well enough. Strange isn’t a man who will allow himself to be messed with, but the hostility is gone. 

‘’I’d appreciate any help I can get,’’ he says and turns away. He is not sure how much more of this he can handle – the endless staring, unreadable looks and pitying gazes and heartbroken glances. ‘’Look, we can just try it out, right? Maybe not the radiation, but there’s other stuff we can try.’’

‘’I can see how it responds to your blood, but that doesn’t rule out all of the dangers,’’ Bruce tells him, tapping on the table. ‘’If it works, you may be the most powerful man in the universe, Tony.’’

‘’All I want is to go home.’’ Tony rises and paces restlessly. His mind is going through the options too quickly to be able to assess all of them correctly. ‘’I’ll try to recreate the Extremis vial. It’s the closest thing I know that should work, and at least I know how that works.’’

Pepper wouldn’t be glad to hear he’s back to tampering with Extremis, Tony thinks. As it as, that is the formula he knows best – he fixed it for Maya, decades ago. And then a few years ago, he’d fixed Pepper as well. If there is any formula he can work with, it’ll be that one, though he’s uncertain if it will work. He couldn’t have known that he would come back to it, and yet.

Here he is, ready to try anything. Anything but going back to the stars.

Strange and Bruce are quiet. Tony does not know if that means they agree with his theory, or if they know that opposing him won’t help. The two of them are sharing a look, and Tony takes a deep breath as he fiddles with his own thumbs. 

It does not matter what they think. It’s not their life that is at stake, here.

‘’You were going to see Pepper, weren’t you?’’ Bruce says. The change in subject is not lost on Tony, but he grins weakly. 

It has been weird – seeing Pepper, being allowed to be near her, fighting. It’s a constant round of him going to see her and always feeling like he lost. He woke up, and he lost.

He needs to talk to her, so they can figure it out once and for all. No matter how broken his heart feels when he goes to see her – they both need some closure. She can’t move on – or won’t – unless he allows her to. He knows that, and he doesn’t want her to hurt just because of him. He loves her too much for that – more than he loves himself, certainly. He’d rather break his own heart than hers, and for that, he’ll have to let her go.

‘’I can come with you,’’ Strange offers. Tony wishes he could come to see her alone – but regardless of whether he managed to talk to Peter and Morgan without blowing up, he still needs the sorcerer. It will never be completely safe without him.

‘’Thank you,’’ he says quietly. Strange smiles – it’s a mere tilt of his lips, an answer all by itself. Tony wonders whether it is genuine kindness that makes the sorcerer keep coming back, or if it is still guilt. 

‘’I’ll start up some tests,’’ Bruce says. Tony nods and gives Strange an address. The sorcerer creates a portal, and through they go.

~*~

It takes them three portals to get there. Pepper is not where Tony expected her to be, and getting her current location was a bit of a hassle. In the end, FRIDAY had given him the information needed, but he just hadn’t thought to ask her before – after all, why would Pepper not be at her own home or at the office?

Because, as it turns out, she is staying at May Parker’s home in Queens.

Strange seems to notice Tony’s nervous energy. The sorcerer stands out in the street, standing with his hands folded next to a garbage can. His Cloak, deep red and slowly swaying despite the lack of wind, looks like it could cost more than one of the apartments they are standing in front of. Even if it wasn’t for his unusual clothes, the man would give the impression of not belonging. This neighbourhood is old and broken. Strange stands there, however, uncaring about whether he fits in or not as Tony pulls at his own sweater.

‘’I will wait outside,’’ Strange says calmly, something comforting in his voice.

Tony takes a breath and taps on the front door – once, twice. When he looks back, Strange is on the other side of the street, reading a notice that is plastered on a window. He seems composed and calm – but then he looks back towards Tony and gives an encouraging nod.

Before he can think of what to do, the door opens before him and he stares in the face of May Parker. Her shoulders tighten into themselves as she stares at him, as if she is trying to make herself smaller. ‘’Tony,’’ she says, and shakes her head to herself. ‘’Mr Stark, I mean.’’

Peter certainly didn’t get his mannerisms from a stranger, though he vaguely recalls that May isn’t even related to him by blood. Well, Tony knows more than anyone that family needs to be found, sometimes. She certainly looks enough like Peter, with her dark hair and eyes. Besides, she has raised him, and he knows how much he adores her.

‘’Tony is fine,’’ he tells her, trying to calm her as he tilts his head. ‘’Is Pepper here?’’

Her twitch is almost imperceptible. Tony wonders if he put her in a tight spot by coming here. She undoubtedly feels uncomfortable. To her credit, she does not give any more signs of her surprise. ‘’Come in,’’ she offers, taking a step to the side so he can enter. ‘’Pepper and Morgan are in the kitchen.’’

The Parker residence is just as tiny and full of life as it was the first time Tony visited. Things had been different then – he thinks about the fight with Steve that he had been in the middle of. Things may not have been necessarily better.

Morgan is the first to spot him. ‘’Dad!’’ she cries out, eyes widening in surprise as she runs over to him and hugs him. Tony lays a hand in her hair, pulling her close for a minute as his heart swells with fondness. Pepper looks up – there are some green spices in her hair. She wears a simple apron over jeans and a shirt, and he has not seen her this relaxed in ages. Her calm posture disappears when she sees him, the lines around her eyes tightening.

‘’Tony,’’ she says, cleaning her hands on the apron. It leaves a smudge. 

‘’Hey, Pep.’’

‘’I didn’t know you were going to come,’’ Pepper mutters. Despite her tenseness, she comes up to hug him as Morgan steps back. There is a smudge of flour on Morgan’s cheek, and Tony absentmindedly rubs it off, even as he focuses on the woman before him.

‘’Should I have called?’’ he asks, and wonders what this has come to. 

Her smile twitches. ‘’You never have to call, Tony,’’ she says, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. ‘’I’m glad you’re here, actually. We were making our own bread and we need a sampler. Do you think you’re up to the task?’’

‘’If May doesn’t mind,’’ Tony says, glancing at their host. Pepper has broken the tension, but May still seems uncertain about what to do. The realization of what has happened is slowly dawning on him, and he has to do his best not to ask a thousand questions at once.

Pepper has fallen for May, somehow. All of Peter’s comments suddenly make sense; his caring for Pepper, his concern about Tony not getting along with her anymore. Even his closer relationship to Morgan. Pepper is a genuine part of Peter’s life now – and it’s May that she met. Peter’s aunt is the one who got Pepper through her grief and made her let go of Tony.

He cannot even begrudge her for it. He knows May well enough to know she is a kind-hearted and supportive woman, and that it has been four years for Pepper. She has moved on – it hurts, but she has. And May is definitely not the worst person for her to be with.

‘’You’re welcome to stay,’’ May says hurriedly, walking into the kitchen. ‘’It just has to go in the oven for a bit. Make yourself comfortable.’’

‘’Isn’t Strange with you?’’ Pepper asks, taking off her apron. 

Tony grimaces. ‘’He’s waiting outside.’’

‘’Tony,’’ she reprimands him. ‘’Why don’t you let the man come in? Hold on, I’ll go and get him. Morgan, why don’t you get your dad something to drink?’’

Morgan dashes into the kitchen without even asking Tony what he wants while Pepper disappears to the front door. Tony just sits on the couch and stares as people come in and out. May is the first to reappear, wringing her hands as she takes a seat next to him. ‘’Do you want me to make people disappear for a while so you can talk to her?’’ she asks wryly.

‘’No, it’s fine,’’ Tony says, and finds that it’s the truth. ‘’I can talk to her later. This is – well, it’s a good thing. I need some normalcy, maybe. And spending time with Pepper and Morgan is always nice. You’re – aren’t you?’’

She sighs, leaning back. ‘’She is afraid to tell you.’’

‘’I know it may be hard to believe, but I’m happy as long as Pepper’s happy,’’ he answers. ‘’I mean – I didn’t expect to wake up, four years late and down a wife, but she’s alive. I’m actually kind of relieved she didn’t have to wait around for me all that time. Well, maybe relieved is the wrong word. But it’s – it’s something close to that. And I’ll be fine as long as my girls are fine.’’

May leans forward. ‘’I’m sorry you had to find out like this. We didn’t mean for this to happen, Tony. If there’s anything I can do for you –‘’

‘’You’re making Pepper happy,’’ he interrupts. ‘’Looks like Morgan likes being around you. I know you’ve done a hell of a job with Peter. I know you’re a strong woman.’’

‘’We bonded over loss,’’ May says, looking away for a moment. There’s a picture standing a few feet away – an old photograph of her and a man. It was taken on her wedding day, and she seems ages younger. Less worry in her eyes. ‘’Peter wanted to be there for her, and she found solace in being around him. Besides, he’s fond of Morgan. I just – fell in the rabbit hole and never came out. I’m not the only strong woman here. Pepper was a rock.’’

‘’I know,’’ Tony mutters. ‘’She’s always been mine.’’

At that moment, Pepper steps back in, Strange following her with something of a pinched expression on his face. ‘’Good afternoon,’’ he says politely, his gaze going over Tony and May. 

‘’You’re both going to stay for lunch,’’ Pepper tells them firmly. ‘’It’s the least we can do. We made bread.’’

Tony offers Strange a small smile as the sorcerer sits down. The Cloak he always wears moves around, taking everything in. ‘’This is cosy,’’ Strange mumbles, eyeing May and shaking her hand as he introduces himself.

The Cloak shakes her hand after, and the look on her face is priceless.

~*~

Danvers leaves but with the promise to remain nearby, in case Tony changes his mind. Stephen is not quite sure how Rhodes pulled that off, but the two of them seem to have a friendly relationship. He does not get involved in others’ affairs, and nonetheless he gets pulled into the Avengers’ lives more and more.

He had been at May Parker’s house only days before, enjoying an almost familial lunch. He had felt out of place, there – Tony, Pepper, May and Morgan all enjoy a closer connection to each other than he can claim to have. The discomfort had not lasted long, as they had shared stories and prompted him to share some in return. It was light in a way that he has never been used to – not during his days at the Metro General Hospital, and not at the Sanctum. There is always a certain pressure on him, and he did not notice until it was gone for a little while.

Tony talked to Pepper afterwards, hushed whispers coming from the hallway. Not wanting to barge in, Stephen had remained in the kitchen to help May clean. Morgan had taken a liking to the Cloak – seeing them play tag had been an experience all by itself.

Nothing of that light feeling remains, now. It has been just over a week – dividing his time between the Sanctum and helping Tony is still difficult, but he manages. He has given all his attention to the Sanctum for years now, and most of the other sorcerers understand that Stephen has a feeling of responsibility towards issues outside of the world of the Mystic Arts. Wong is just as capable of running a Sanctum in the meantime, and his defences hold strong. Unless something truly dangerous happens, he can be missed for a little while.

No matter how hard he tries to help Tony, however, it seems most of his efforts are in vain.

They started out with several vials, all containing a virus made with a different formula. Tony had taken something called Extremis and modified it – Stephen vaguely remembers the problems it had caused in 2013, when he heard the story from the man. As far as he is aware, Extremis had never been public knowledge. Perhaps for the best.

Stephen’s knowledge about chemistry is extensive, though it has never been his specialty. He had helped Bruce and the other off-site chemists in creating it, and testing out the different viruses on Tony’s blood. None of the viruses had worked, so far.

And their options are slowly dwindling. 

Tony has been slowly worsening over the past few days, both in mood and health. He has had two outbursts of energy – fewer than Stephen would have expected, though no less painful for Tony, and he’d been there to manage both of them. Shielding Tony takes a lot out of him, however, and Tony is usually exhausted afterwards as well. He has grown used to watching Tony’s hands every few minutes, especially when the man is stressed. The signs are always there just before it becomes too dangerous – a slow morphing of colour in his veins, glittering faintly through his skin. 

The outbursts aren’t the major problem, however. The biggest issue is that they are getting nowhere.

Even now, Tony is twirling on his chair. Stephen has already learnt that the more frustrated Tony gets, the more he will move. He is a whirlwind in action; always moving, never stopping. And the fact that he is being slowed down by the lack of solutions is playing on all of them.

‘’Tony,’’ Bruce says resolutely. He is strong enough to stop the chair from spinning. ‘’Just because this one didn’t work –‘’

‘’None of them are working,’’ Tony interrupts. There is a crazed air about him – Stephen recognizes it all too well from his own sleepless nights in college, trying to absorb all material as quickly as he could. Tony is doing the same, but on a whole other level. He may not have slept for days, and that only means that the risk of him setting of another explosion in himself is all the higher for it, Stephen believes. 

His veins aren’t changing colours yet, but that may change soon. ‘’It takes time,’’ Bruce says. It is difficult to read his expressions, what with his Hulk-sized face, but Stephen has gotten the hang of it. Not that he has seen Bruce ever look anything but stressed, perhaps. And yet, there are tight lines around his mouth that speak for themselves.

Tony huffs out a desperate laugh and rises from the chair. ‘’I don’t have time,’’ he says, throwing his hands in the air. ‘’I have money, I have employees, I have knowledge. Time? Not so much. If this isn’t going to work, Bruce, we have to stop trying.’’

Bruce stills at that. ‘’Stop trying?’’

‘’This is a failure,’’ Tony starts. ‘’Nothing about this works – we can’t use Extremis. All we’ve seen is that it can’t mix with – well, with whatever the Stones did to me. They can’t work together – I’ll just blow up and die all the quicker for it. Bruce, I’ve thought about this day and night. You have, as well.’’

‘’We have only been working a little more than a week,’’ Stephen says quietly. ‘’Do you just want to give up?’’

‘’Don’t I get to?’’ Tony asks as he leans against the desk. He does not look so crazed now – merely defeated. ‘’I’ve been fighting for every moment of my life to get here. To get to the life I wanted to have. To settle down with Pepper. To raise my daughter. And I don’t seem to be getting any closer to any of it. So maybe I’m not supposed to have that life, right?’’

‘’If you were not supposed to have it, you’d have died right there after using the Stones,’’ Stephen snaps. ‘’Do you not owe it to your family to fight for just a bit longer? Are you truly willing to give up so easily and leave them?’’

Tony sighs and sags back into his chair. ‘’I don’t want to, Strange,’’ he says. His voice is cracking from exhaustion, like a fire burning out. Like the only thing left are ashy residues, slightly hot to the touch but not nearly as dangerous. ‘’I want to stay. I’ve missed four years of Morgan’s life, and to think of missing more – I don’t want to. But I haven’t slept in days, afraid of hurting someone. Trying to figure out a way this might work. But the powers that the Stones gave me – they fight anything we could inject into me to make me survive. I have a year. If I can’t have more, then I’ll just have to make the best of that, won’t I?’’

And there it is - the crux of the matter. Tony’s eyes are almost golden in the light falling through the windows, the few grey hairs standing out in the light. Perhaps he is a fire – a phoenix, to rise and fall. And yet, he has not quite died out yet. There are still some smouldering embers, waiting to be rekindled again. The flames are dying, but Stephen has no intention of seeing them extinguished altogether.

‘’No,’’ he says simply. Tony looks up at him, some dark humour tugging at his lips.

‘’I know you’re a powerful wizard, but we don’t have a solution. Not even you can just rip out these powers. Didn’t you say I’d die without them?’’

‘’You seem to be forgetting there _is_ a solution,’’ Stephen points out.

Bruce breathes out. ‘’Carol Danvers.’’

And just like that, it isn’t over anymore. Tony’s expression morphs into something else – still exhaustion, but some wary resolve as well. ‘’I can’t go into space,’’ he just says.

‘’You have to,’’ Stephen tells him. ‘’For your daughter. For your own sake.’’

Tony seems resigned, his shoulders bowing under the weight of a new decision. He just exhales, muttering something to himself. Stephen cannot hear what he is saying and he doesn’t think he is meant to. Closing his eyes, Tony shakes his head to himself. His gestures are all minuscule – barely noticeable to anyone who is not watching him quite so intently. And yet, Stephen sees.

Tony straightens himself out and moves towards the exit, his steps certain. ‘’Where are you going?’’ Bruce yells after him.

‘’There’s someone I need to talk to,’’ Tony says, just as he grabs the cold metal handle of the door. His fingers are slightly shaking, but still untouched by his powers. ‘’Someone I should’ve talked to a while ago, maybe. Someone who knows everything about not getting to say goodbye. I’ll come back later.’’

The door falls shut behind him, leaving Stephen and Bruce staring after him. ‘’Do you have any clue who he is talking about?’’ Bruce asks.

‘’None whatsoever,’’ Stephen answers wryly. 

All he can hope is that Tony will come to the right decision.

~*~

The graveyard is rather peaceful. There are other people walking around, but Tony isn’t near enough to make out their faces. Besides, everyone that is here seems to have their own problems. Their own ghosts to converse with, just like Tony. Perhaps they are all the same, when it comes to that. Talking to ghosts, hoping to relieve their own pain.

He wonders if Pepper and Morgan talked to him, when he was in that coma. Wonders if he was their ghost. Wonders if he still is, in a way.

Tony just sits down next to the plain black headstone, when he finds it. _Captain Steve Rogers_ , it reads, _Captain America. Defender of justice and peace_. There is a date underneath, and Tony slowly lets his fingers brush over the engraving. Somewhere underneath the ground, his friend lies buried.

Steve never knew that Tony would wake up. Tony wonders what he would’ve said. If he would’ve talked to the ghost, as well. If it would have helped.

There are some flowers that decorate the simple resting place. ‘’Hey, Steve,’’ he tries, and if his voice sounds rough, he ignores that. He swallows thickly, considering his words. ‘’It’s Tony. I – uh, well, maybe you didn’t expect me here. But I’m back. I wish I could’ve talked to you one last time – you know, just to say goodbye, maybe. Sometimes you just don’t get around to saying goodbye to people, though. You know that better than anyone – and I wanted to know how you dealt with that. Yeah, alright, I know you can’t answer me. Don’t be a wise-ass, Rogers.’’

It feels weird. Steve can’t hear him – Tony doesn’t believe in heaven or in hell or in any other sort of afterlife. But this is something he needs to do, and he lets his fingers fall away from the tombstone and onto the warm grass that covers the grave. It feels more personal, that way, though he would hardly be able to explain why.

‘’I don’t know how to feel about what you did,’’ he continues quietly. ‘’I don’t know if it was selfish or brave. But it was your choice – one you made for your own happiness and for your own future. Because you got to seize that chance to get the life you wanted – and I need to do that as well, maybe. If I do this – if I’m going to space, I may not come back. I may not get to say goodbye to Morgan. But if I stay, I’ll be saying goodbye before I want to. And I don’t know what to do.’’

There are birds chirping around him. No answer comes from the dirt. Tony falls to his knees before the headstone, leaning his head against the cold granite as he closes his eyes. Steve was many things, but he wasn’t afraid. Tony does not know if he can ever truly forgive the captain, but it doesn’t seem to matter so much now that Steve is gone. It feels odd to hold onto grudges that can’t lead to anything but pain – Steve is gone, and perhaps Tony will be too, in the near future.

‘’Alright,’’ he mutters to himself. ‘’It’s a chance, right? You went back in time – and for what? For a dance? Travelled through all that time for that? Sounds impossible, but you did. I can travel a galaxy for the chance to see my daughter again. I can’t waste away in front of her, but I can try to make myself live for her. You got your legacy in Sam, but I want to see her grow up, Steve. So maybe that’s a bit selfish of me, too. Fighting the odds, once again. It’s worked out, so far. Maybe it’ll work out again.’’

With a huff, he rises, holding onto the tombstone as he gets back to his feet. He scrubs the dirt off his pants and pats the granite fondly.

Maybe Tony will never understand why Steve made the choice that he did – but there is no denying that Steve made a choice, and one that seemed to have made him happy. Now, Tony can make a choice too – fight and hold on a little longer, or stay and waste away. And Tony has never given up before.

Strange was right – and so were Rhodey and Pepper and everyone else that wanted him to take the chance. Tony has never gotten more than one, and it seems this is no different. He has beaten worse odds before, and perhaps he will again, in the future. He just has to stay alive for it – to see what will come. To see the people he loves grow up and grow old, and he wants to grow with them.

‘’Good talk, Steve,’’ he says. ‘’I hope you had a hell of a life.’’

With that, and one final lingering look, he walks back to his car.

He has a journey to prepare for.


	6. Chapter 6

He doesn’t look that different from how he remembers. Courtesy of the Time Stone, he thinks; he remembers Strange telling him that he hadn’t biologically aged since using the Gauntlet. And yet, there are some scars running over the right side of his body. They are faint – his accelerated healing had taken care of the most prominent damage, but they are still there, visible to the keen eye. 

Tony wonders how close to dying he’d come, that day. If it would have been possible for the powers that the Stones had given him to not be enough to save him. He had certainly felt like he was dying, back then. 

He doesn’t like to linger on the scarring. It’s only one more reminder of what happened, if the rest of it isn’t enough.

‘’What do you think?’’ Strange asks him. His gaze isn’t on the scars, but on the suit. ‘’I’ve enchanted it extensively. At least you won’t burn off your clothes in space.’’

‘’It’d be better if you could put this spell all over my surroundings,’’ Tony tells him, frowning as he turns. It’s a space suit, dark with sleek lines. It fits him perfectly and now, with Strange’s spells, should not be affected by his powers. That means that he won’t have to streak in space, and that’s something.

Strange huffs out something resembling a laugh. It seems he doesn’t take it as an insult, and Tony is glad for the sorcerer’s dry acceptance of Tony’s incapacity to thank the man. ‘’It’s not as easy,’’ Stephen says. ‘’The Mystic Arts has rules – just like science. This only works because it’s close to you. It has to do with a very interesting theory that has not been fully worked out yet. I can enchant the ship that you are taking, and try to make some of the machinery resistant to your powers. I cannot guarantee success, however. Maybe it’ll be a bit stronger, but to take the full blast of your powers – that is asking a lot. That is asking too much, even.’’

It’s the closest they have ever come to discussing the major flaws that the plan has. Rhodey has informed Danvers that Tony is coming with her to some faraway planet for a solution, but there are a dozen matters that haven’t been worked out fully. 

Tony has accepted that he will die if he remains on Earth, but he’s not even sure that he can leave at all.

‘’Well, I’ll take what I can get,’’ he says neutrally, casting one last glance at himself. He’s getting too old for impromptu space travel – but without it, he won’t get any older. It is the only reason he would go out there again at all. 

‘’It’s the best I can do for you.’’

He finds Strange’s gaze in the mirror. The sorcerer is looking at him thoughtfully. He doesn’t know Strange that well, but he has aged as well during the years that Tony slept. There are some lines in his forehead, and the grey in his hair is even more prominent than it already was. He still holds himself steadily, however, and Tony wonders how old Strange actually is. It is odd, how little he knows about the man. He’d done some research after he came back from Titan, to find out who exactly the person was that had traded the Time Stone for Tony’s life. Those had only been basic facts, and Tony had been frustrated with the lack of information, so he’d not read a lot of it.

Now, he wishes he had. Strange seems hardened in a way that very few people are and his wit equals Tony’s. His actions are genuinely kind but he does not bend to other people’s wills.

Tony can respect that, even if he doesn’t know how Strange came to be like this. It’s something Tony only learnt after long years of dealing with the superhero life – something he slowly came to realize. He has always been too needy, maybe. Too reliant. Though, perhaps, that is for the better in his case. Tony doesn’t do well, when he starts feeling lonely. And Strange – well, Strange looks like a man who doesn’t need anyone in the way that Tony does.

‘’Yeah,’’ he says, and turns away again. 

‘’Why did you go to Steve Rogers?’’ Strange asks. ‘’You visited his grave.’’

Tony doesn’t ask him how he knows. It is probably because all the rumours in the Compound are about him, nowadays. Besides, Strange has spent an unnecessarily great amount of time with Rhodey and Pepper. Either of them could have told him, if they thought he should know for some reason. He breathes out. If he wanted, he could ask Strange to leave, or not answer the question. He is all by himself right now, and he doesn’t have to meet with Danvers until later in the afternoon.

But perhaps Strange deserves something from Tony, too. Even if it’s something as simple as an answer. ‘’Steve died before I could say goodbye to him,’’ he says quietly. ‘’We weren’t – well, things have been complicated since I met him. But we were friends, at some point, or I thought we were. I had hoped we could be again. And I know that Steve – Steve had this thing with goodbyes, right? He never got to say goodbye to the people he cared about. And if I go on this trip, I may not get to, either.’’

‘’He said goodbye to you,’’ Strange carefully says. ‘’He was at the hospital, the day before he left with the Stones. I walked in on him – I knew he wasn’t going to come back. You both got to say your goodbyes, Tony. Even if it wasn’t at the same time.’’

Tony fleetingly smiles for a second – it helps, it does. But the ache still doesn’t go away. He woke up to find Steve was dead, and he has lost so many already. He never really thought any of the Avengers would die before him. 

He lost Natasha, already. He wonders what she’d have said about his trip. She’d probably have smiled at him half-heartedly and made a comment about – well, who knows? She isn’t here anymore. And neither is Steve, now. Clint is off to be with his family, and Thor has left the planet. The only one who is still here is Bruce, and Tony never got any closure with the other Avengers. Clint had talked to him only for a few minutes, and neither of them had known very well what to say. Tony doesn’t even know if Thor is aware of the fact that he’s awake.

It appears that Tony is the one who did not get to say goodbye, this time around.

‘’I don’t understand why he went back,’’ Tony says, looking down at himself. He hadn’t realized he had curled his hands into fists, and he slowly relaxes them. ‘’I know he missed his past, but – weren’t we enough? He didn’t have anyone there to share what happened to him. I thought he belonged here, now. Seems like he didn’t.’’

‘’It was his choice,’’ Strange murmurs.

Tony straightens his shoulders. ‘’I know. And I can’t blame him for choosing for a life that makes him happy. I just don’t know why he wanted it. Hadn’t thought that he still would, maybe. Or I’m just bitter that everyone moved on and I was just lying around.’’

‘’This is about more than Rogers.’’

Tony closes his eyes. ‘’Didn’t take you for that kind of doctor, Strange.’’

The sorcerer shuffles behind him. ‘’I’m not.’’

‘’I’m afraid,’’ he says, before he can second-guess himself. He opens his eyes to look at Strange. The doctor has tilted his head. His expression doesn’t give anything away – Tony wonders what it will take to make Strange look surprised. ‘’I can’t tell Pepper or Rhodey, can I? How do you tell the persons you care about most, the ones who’ve had your back for decades, that you may not ever get to see them again? How do you say goodbye when you hope it’s not going to be goodbye?’’

‘’I don’t know,’’ Strange says.

Tony leans against the wall, looking away. ‘’How do I say goodbye to Morgan? What do I do if this doesn’t work?’’

‘’Your journey will not take that long,’’ Strange reminds him. ‘’Even if it doesn’t work – you’ll have time left here. Time to say goodbye.’’

‘’It’s space. I don’t know what can happen. I can’t prepare.’’

Strange’s eyes are eerily light. ‘’I don’t think you will die in space.’’

‘’Why?’’

‘’Call it a hunch. You haven’t come this far – survived all of this, just to die like that. I don’t believe it.’’

‘’That’s how life works, Strange. It’s pointless and random. Things don’t happen for a reason.’’

Strange smiles as if he knows a secret that Tony doesn’t. ‘’I used to think the same thing.’’

‘’And now?’’ Tony asks. Strange is an enigma, at the best of times. Now is no different.

‘’I used to think that we were momentary specks in an indifferent universe. That no one was meant to do anything – fate was non-existent, made up by people who wanted to believe in something more. Life was without goal and did not mean anything. I’d made my peace with that. But now – I don’t think that, anymore. And I know you don’t believe that.’’

Tony snorts. ‘’You presume an awful lot.’’

‘’Do I?’’ Strange retorts, but his smile has turned into a knowing grin. ‘’How have you survived all these years without having some faith? A belief that, in the end, everything has a reason? I think that you do believe that everything is going to work out exactly the way it is supposed to.’’

There is a recording, that Tony had made before they time-travelled. Safely stored into FRIDAY’s servers, in case of his death. It has been a while since he made it – he doesn’t recall exactly what he had said. No one has ever seen that recording, but Strange’s words hit something.

He _did_ believe that. He _still_ believes that. And judging by the way Strange is looking at him, he knows it, as well.

‘’Maybe,’’ he says, not willing to give Strange the satisfaction of admitting he’s right. ‘’And in that case – I hope we’re both right.’’

‘’We won’t know until it’s done,’’ Strange says wisely.

He has a point.

~*~

Tony taps on the table with his fingers. His nails are too short to make much of a sound against the glass, but the movement comforts him nonetheless. Rhodey’s eyes are heavy on him, opposite the table, but Tony ignores him to stare at Danvers. Bruce has just crossed his arms. He has a special chair to take the Hulk’s size, but it still creaks as he moves.

Strange looks mostly intrigued, leaning forward. His interest is amusing, to Tony – who knew that the sorcerer would care about space travel? There are a thousand things he can do with his powers, and yet technology can still baffle the mind.

‘’There is a planet, but it’s nowhere near Earth,’’ Danvers tells them, and there is a hologram. The planet she shows them has a pinkish hue about it, mixed in with some blue. It looks a lot like Earth in every other way, and Tony frowns at it as she continues. ‘’Their technology is among the most advanced in the galaxy, though they are a bit isolated. They have a lot of experiences with many kinds of illnesses, and if there’s anyone who knows how to help, it will be them.’’

‘’But we do not know for sure?’’ Strange interferes.

Danvers’ lips tilt. ‘’Not for sure, no. But you asked me for a chance, and I’m giving it to you.’’

‘’For which we are very grateful,’’ Bruce says. ‘’Continue.’’

Danvers stares at Strange for a moment long before she turns back to her hologram. ‘’This planet is called Zenn-La. The Zenn-Lavians are a peaceful people, but situated on the other side of the galaxy. A trip there would take a while, and I do not know how long they’d take to heal you.’’

‘’Do they know anything about the Infinity Stones?’’ Tony asks, tilting his head. ‘’Even if they know about other diseases – this isn’t exactly a standard issue.’’

‘’I think they’d be able to adapt, though no, they don’t have any experience with the Stones as far as I know,’’ Danvers says easily. ‘’But we do, and they’ll have some time to figure it out. I’ve seen a lot of things in the universe, Stark. You can ask me a thousand more questions about Zenn-La, but I’m not going to be able to change your mind if you don’t want me to. I can take you there with a spaceship, or I can’t. It’s up to you.’’

He admires her honesty, at least. Danvers raises her eyebrows as she watches him. Tony remembers seeing her, the first time – stuck in the spaceship with Nebula, thinking he’d have less than a day to live. She was the reason he had survived the first time around. Maybe she can help him survive a second time.

He sighs. ‘’We can’t just up and leave,’’ he says, trying not to feel his chest tighten in anxiety. He does not want to go to space, but Danvers is right. It is up to him, and he owes it to Morgan. He has a daughter to live for. ‘’We need to make preparations. At this rate, I’ll destroy any ship I’m on.’’

‘’We haven’t found anything that can stop Tony’s blasts as much as Stephen can,’’ Bruce says, by way of explanation. ‘’There doesn’t seem to be anything else as powerful.’’

‘’What if we sedate Tony?’’ Rhodey asks, and sends an apologetic glance in Tony’s direction. ‘’Put him to sleep during the journey there? That would stop him from exploding stuff.’’

It doesn’t sound all that bad. As loathe as Tony is to miss more time, it would maybe solve some problems. He won’t be awake to be anxious about space, and he will not have the opportunity to blow up their spaceship. 

‘’Doubtful,’’ Strange cuts in. ‘’The powers woke Tony from a _coma_. Putting him in an induced sleep may help for a while, but I would not be quite as prepared to say that it would guarantee weeks without. Perhaps the blast would be even worse and the ship might be broken beyond repair. No, there needs to be another way to contain the powers.’’

‘’There isn’t, or we wouldn’t be in this situation,’’ Tony says.

‘’What if Strange came along?’’ Danvers cuts.

The room falls silent. Tony glances at Strange – the sorcerer’s brow is furrowed, his expression hesitant. It would be a lot to ask of him, in any case. Strange still looks intently at the planet on the hologram, studying it with sharp eyes while his facial expression doesn’t move.

‘’You are asking me,’’ he starts slowly, ‘’to go on a spaceship to make sure Tony gets to an alien planet without trouble? To leave my Sanctum for weeks on end to act as a shield?’’

‘’I’m not asking anything,’’ Danvers says with some brutal amusement, but Rhodey rises. Maybe he senses that the tension is rising. Tony just watches everything unfold slowly.

‘’Isn’t there another way?’’ his friend says, leaning on the table. ‘’Strange – you have those portals? Can’t you, I don’t know, make a portal to that planet?’’

‘’That is not how it works,’’ Strange says.

‘’Well, how does it work, then?’’ Rhodey presses, a tinge of frustration entering his tone. ‘’Can’t you make portals on that spaceship? Guard Tony from far away? Because I hate to say it, but we’re kind of relying on you. Nothing else helps. It might take too long to find something that will.’’

Strange sighs and puts his face in a hand, the other one tapping the table. It is the first time that Tony has seen him actively frustrated, and there’s nothing he can say. Seeing Strange in conflict isn’t exactly what he meant to get out of this meeting.

‘’The portals are a way of transportation that are as old as civilization, but they do have restrictions,’’ Strange explains wearily. He waves his hand around as if showing them what he means. ‘’Portals are small fractures in the dimension – we destroy space, but in small pieces, and then put them back together. It is harmless over a certain distance, but we cannot just create portals everywhere. We need to know exactly where we need to go, and there is a certain limit to the distance. If the space between two portals is too large, we might just end up breaking something that we do not want to break.’’

‘’Like space jumps,’’ Danvers says thoughtfully. ‘’You go from a certain jumping point to the next, but there is a certain limit to the distance. It gets too dangerous, otherwise. It’s dangerous to both living beings and the actual dimension of space itself.’’

‘’It’s the same principle,’’ Strange nods. ‘’I cannot use the portals to travel distances that are too long – it poses a risk I cannot take.’’

‘’So the only option is you coming along?’’ Tony asks. Strange meets his eyes now – strangely intense, almost as an apology. It doesn’t make Tony feel any better, but Strange’s expression does not change. His lips are pressed tightly together.

‘’Let’s just take a moment to think about it,’’ Bruce wisely says, pushing up his glasses in anxiety. ‘’Take a night to mull things over. We can’t go tomorrow either way, and there’s lots of other things to prepare.’’

Tony nods slowly. Strange just rises from his chair. ‘’I must go back to the Sanctum, but I will be back tomorrow morning,’’ he announces. With a last glance at Tony, he disappears into a portal. With that, the meeting ends. Tony just smiles deprecatingly to himself and leans back in his chair as Bruce gets to his feet.

‘’What does that even mean?’’ Danvers says, looking to where Strange disappeared. 

Tony grimaces, feeling ten times heavier as he stands as well. ‘’It means that you took him by surprise,’’ he says, leaning against the table. His hands are stark white as they take the pressure of his weight, but at least the colours aren’t shifting. At least he is still in control, for now. ‘’It means that we have to wait for an answer.’’

No one knows what to say to that.

~*~ 

If there is one thing that Stephen has learnt in the Sanctum, it is that a steady mind is the most important weapon a sorcerer can have.

It’s impossible to enchant something without being in the right mindset. The Mystic Arts require focus and endurance, besides knowledge. Stephen has learnt this all too well – his best spells are done when he has slept enough and is calm, though he certainly will be able to conjure up some weapons during an unexpected battle. But the spells last longer and are stronger if the one who casts them is at their best.

This is the reason why meditation is important. The gardens are there for that exact purpose, and they are the place that Stephen finds it easiest to focus. He had never thought that meditating would be the first thing he did every morning, when he was still a doctor – he had thought it was idiotic, nonsense, and he had insulted everyone who did it. He knows better, now. He knows a lot of things he hadn’t believed in.

Some sorcerers prefer to meditate inside, but Stephen likes the gardens. The rain is softly falling, but it doesn’t make a sound on the grass. He can only hear it quietly splattering on the leaves of the trees if he strains his ears, but he prefers focusing on other things. His fingers brush against the tall blades of grass, the dew sticking on his fingers. His hands do not tremble, when he focuses like this – he is in complete control, the way he cannot always be.

His mind rules his body, and the Mystic Arts fills his conscience. It is a warmth spreading throughout his veins, sharpening his senses. He flicks a single finger and feels the grass move with it. His skin soaks up the water. A shudder wants to go through his body, but Stephen takes a deep breath and does not allow himself to move. He is completely still, just focusing on that one connection between what grows in his Sanctum and his scarred digits.

He sits cross-legged, the Cloak draped over him, equally silent. If Stephen is truly deeply in trance, he can hear the echo from other dimensions. He has only heard such an echo once or twice, however, and he’d been meditating for days on end. These little meditation sessions are just for him to regain his strength and tranquillity.

Something rustles from a few feet away. Stephen’s eyes snap open, focusing on the perpetrator immediately. 

‘’Sorry,’’ Tony Stark says, wincing as he sees him. ‘’Were you – do sorcerers really do that? I thought that was kind of – well, you know. Buddha, world peace, what do you know. Assumed it was kind of old-fashioned.’’

‘’Traditional. That is the word you are looking for,’’ Stephen says, and does not rise.

Tony’s lips tilt for a second, before he walks across the garden. He stops before the tree in the corner of the small space, his back turned to Stephen. ‘’I’m not really one for tradition,’’ he mutters, his fingers softly gliding over the green leaves.

Stephen huffs. ‘’Settled down in a cabin with a wife and daughter. I think you’re more traditional than you give yourself credit for.’’

The man turns back to him, leaning against the trunk. ‘’Trying to pretend, maybe. I’m not sure the cabin life is much for me, anyway. I think the peace appealed to me, mostly. Getting away from everyone asking questions – everyone pointing fingers. Everyone expecting me to know what to do.’’

‘’You did know what to do,’’ Stephen says, taking a breath. He is not going back to meditating any time soon. Years of training in the Sanctum have made him more agile than he has ever been, and he rises smoothly without having to push himself up first. 

Tony shrugs, still looking up at the leaves above him. A few drops of rain fall on his face, but he does not seem bothered much. ‘’I didn’t. But that’s not really why I’m here.’’

Stephen can guess at the reason he came. He smiles wryly – Tony can say what he wants to say, but Stephen doesn’t want to stay in the garden for it. He has been sitting here a while, already, and he might just as well get something to drink while Tony speaks.

‘’Come,’’ he says, and gestures back to the entrance. ‘’We’ve got tea. Or coffee, if you want it.’’

He does not watch to see if Tony follows, but he knows that he does. The way to the study room is not long, but Tony trails behind him uncertainly. ‘’You fixed up the place, I see,’’ the man says, when they pass the stairs. 

Stephen thinks back to the day Thanos came, and Bruce had fallen into the stairs. So much has happened, since then. ‘’Not me,’’ he confesses. ‘’They had five years to repair it when I – wasn’t here. Wong oversaw the Sanctum, in my absence.’’

‘’Of course,’’ Tony says awkwardly. ‘’Wong. Yeah. He let me in. Didn’t seem happy to see me.’’

‘’He showed an emotion?’’ Stephen says in amusement, turning another corner. Wong is notoriously neutral to anyone he doesn’t know well.

‘’Well, it was more of a glare.’’

Stephen huffs out a laugh as he opens the door, waving his hand. Immediately, two cups fill themselves up with tea and fly towards him. Stephen hands the second one to a bewildered Tony, who sniffs at the cup in suspense.

‘’Wong glares at everyone,’’ he informs him. ‘’Sit. You aren’t here to talk about Wong, or the Sanctum. You are not even here to insult the practice of meditation.’’

‘’If you think that counts as insulting, you haven’t heard me talk about Justin Hammer,’’ Tony says, cautiously taking a first sip and grimacing. ‘’That’s hot. How do you drink this?’’

Stephen shakes his head, taking a seat on the sofa as he gingerly holds his own cup. ‘’Blow on it. Add some cold water, if you’re truly impatient. Now, I know why you are here, obviously. What I do not know, however, is what you want to say to me.’’

‘’I didn’t want to say anything,’’ Tony says, still glaring at his tea as he sits opposite Stephen. ‘’I wanted to ask you something, though.’’

Stephen tilts his head. ‘’And what is that?’’

‘’You’re the Sorcerer Supreme, right, whatever that is? You’re the leader of whatever is going on here. How long have you been one, exactly?’’

The steam from the tea makes Stephen sniffle, and he puts his cup on the table before him as he regards Tony. ‘’Not for that long,’’ he admits. ‘’Two years, before the Snap. And now four years after.’’

‘’So you’ve been gone for about as long as you were here,’’ Tony says.

Stephen does not know where he is going with this. ‘’Yes. Wong dealt with the Sanctum in the meantime. There must always be someone on the look-out for interdimensional threats.’’

‘’But not necessarily the Sorcerer Supreme?’’ Tony asks.

‘’No, but it is desirable. There are cases where it simply isn’t possible.’’

‘’You were gone for five years,’’ Tony says simply, leaning forward as he wrings his hands. This is as quietly determined as Stephen has ever seen him – a man who knows what he wants. ‘’The universe didn’t collapse, even if half of your sorcerers were gone. You have all of them back, right now, and your right hand is still here. Strange – you were the one who told me this was the only way. Back when we were on Titan, I trusted you. It may not have been the way I wanted things to go, but it worked. Once again, I’m on a path where there’s only one way. Once again, you were the one who told me this was the way to go. So why do you need to think about this?’’

And there it is. ‘’Because you are asking me to go on a trip in space and leave my duties,’’ Stephen reminds him, none too gently. ‘’I want to help you, Tony, I truly do, but it is not as simple as –‘’

‘’You’re the only one who can help me,’’ Tony intervenes, standing up. ‘’You and Carol, don’t you see? If either one of you won’t go along with the plan, that’s it for me. And I don’t get why you’re being so difficult about this! You have been trying to help since the start, so why is this such a difficult thing for you to do? It’s a few weeks, and your Sanctum survived for years without you before!’’

‘’And what if something happened?’’ Stephen asks forcefully. ‘’What if I came with you and something came to destroy the Sanctum? What if it attacked the world?’’

Tony sighs, sitting down again. His hands find the cup of tea, enfolding it gently. ‘’The world has survived without you before, and it can again,’’ he says quietly. ‘’I know I have no right to ask this of you. But I will die if I don’t and you know that as well. There’s dozens of superheroes here who would give their life to protect the world. There’s a Sanctum full of capable sorcerers who can do things that some of us can only dream of. I know you have an important job here. And I wouldn’t ask this of you if I didn’t have to. I’ve always – well, bit of a lone ranger, Rhodey once called me. I don’t like asking for help. I prefer doing stuff by myself – always have. But if there’s one thing the Avengers taught me, it’s that there are some things that you can’t do by yourself. And I know this is one of those things.’’

‘’Tony –‘’

‘’This isn’t the first time I’m dying, Strange. I don’t need an answer right now, either. I just wanted – well, I’m not actually sure, you know? I’ll just – I’ll let myself out. Pepper wanted to call me, and Morgan has been a bit anxious about everything. I’ll see you tomorrow, right?’’

‘’Tomorrow,’’ Stephen promises him. Tony sends him one last smile, putting down his cup before he leaves. The tea in it has barely been touched – Stephen grimaces. 

There is a choice to make, and it seems to be abundantly clear. He cannot leave Tony to die – and he will die, if Stephen doesn’t come. There is no other way they can go, and he cannot guarantee a man’s death just because something might happen here. And Tony is right: Wong and his other sorcerers are here, and they can miss him for a few weeks.

They might not be happy about it, but Stephen has a duty towards Tony as well. He promised to do whatever he could to help, and here it is – the way to help, whether he likes it or not. He closes his eyes for a second, shaking his head to himself.

He downs his own tea, and then rises. He has to talk to Wong, first.

~*~

The coffee is barely hot anymore, when Tony takes the next sip. He grimaces at the bitter aftertaste and the lack of scorching sensation in his throat – but it’s his own fault that he let it grow cold. He was too busy thinking about everything else. Anyway, it’s better than the scalding hot tea at the Sanctum.

‘’Want me to make you a new cup?’’

Rhodey grins at him as Tony turns, frowning. ‘’What are you doing here?’’ he asks, scratching his neck as he leans back in the couch. ‘’It’s four in the morning. You should be asleep.’’

‘’So should you. But it’s more of a throwback to our MIT days like this, don’t you think?’’

Tony just sighs and pushes his cup of coffee away with his big toe, resting his feet on the glass table as he cocks up his head to regard his oldest friend. ‘’I didn’t realize you were that nostalgic.’’

Rhodey shrugs and turns on the coffee maker. His back is turned to Tony, but his stance is easy enough to read. The machine whirs until it’s done; Rhodey wordlessly puts a second cup under the machine, waiting for the liquid to arrive.

He sits down next to Tony, handing him a new drink. ‘’Sometimes, you need a little nostalgia,’’ he says. ‘’Thought about those days a lot, you know. I hated seeing you lie there, never moving. I just remember a sixteen-year-old kid who never stopped talking.’’

‘’Kids grow up,’’ Tony says quietly. ‘’I did.’’

Rhodey smiles at that – warm and fond, and like he knows a secret. He has always known more about Tony than Tony himself did, so maybe he does. 

‘’I saw yours growing up a bit,’’ Rhodey tells him, taking a sip of his coffee. ‘’I’m just glad you can see her grow up, too. Because I know this is going to work, Tony.’’

‘’You sound like Strange,’’ Tony mutters.

‘’Did he say he’d come?’’

‘’I don’t know if he’ll come. But before the meeting – he said some stuff. About fate, and specks in an indifferent universe, and – I don’t know. He’s a sorcerer, he’s just saying things. Mantras, all that kind of crap.’’

Rhodey raises an eyebrow, at that. ‘’And one of the most powerful men on this planet, if I’m not wrong. Strange isn’t an idiot, Tony. Besides, I don’t think he’ll let us down. You weren’t awake for it, but Stephen is the first one who came into action after you – well, after you did what you did. He made sure you survived, tried to get you awake. Pepper despised him for a little while, you know? She remembered what you’d told us – what he’d said. But I could never blame him. Can you?’’

‘’I shouldn’t,’’ Tony says. ‘’But – yeah, a part of me does blame him. He knew, more than any of us. And I know he did what he had to, but –‘’

‘’He only knew what would happen because he saw you doing it, Tony. You made your own choices – not him. And yet, he’s feeling guilty. You know it as well as I do. That man? I don’t know him that well, but I think he’s going to come. Because he’s been sitting next to your bedside for four years, and you don’t do something like that if you don’t care.’’

That is not the problem. Tony has learnt well enough that Strange cares – he knows that the doctor feels guilty over everything that happened. He just doesn’t know if it is enough to keep him away from his duty. He may not know Strange that well, but he knows that his job as Sorcerer Supreme is the most important thing in the world to Strange. It’s obvious. And it’s for a good reason. Tony feels bad for going to the Sanctum to guilt-trip Strange into coming along, but this – well, if Strange doesn’t come, he’s finished. And he can’t be, now that he’s made up his mind.

‘’Right,’’ he just says, and takes his coffee in his hands. His hands are already clammy, but he feels too cold. He should not even be sitting here, with Rhodey – yet none of them mention the elephant in the room. At this point, he does not think Rhodey will mind Tony blowing him up. It’s been par for the course for as long as they’ve known each other.

Rhodey bumps his shoulder – softly, so he won’t spill his hot drink. ‘’You’ve got a lot of people who care, Tony. You know that Pepper missed you every single day, don’t you?’’

It is still not an easy subject, even if Tony is trying his best to make peace with it. ‘’You were my best man,’’ he mutters, shaking his head to himself. He grabs his cup tighter, just so he won’t have to see his hands shake. ‘’Did you ever think this marriage was going to end? Because I sure didn’t. I didn’t even get to fight for it.’’

‘’No,’’ Rhodey says. ‘’You had to fight for half the life of the galaxy, instead.’’

Tony chokes out a laugh. ‘’I just want her to be happy. May is a wonderful woman, and now Peter has two parent figures, and that’s –‘’

‘’Two?’’ Rhodey intervenes, his eyes sparkling. ‘’Are you forgetting about yourself? That’s three, Tones. Look, I don’t want to make you miserable, with this. I know it’s not going to be easy, when you’ve been with Pepper as long as you have. And I don’t want you to go into space with Danvers and Strange without knowing that it’s going to be alright. She still loves you.’’

‘’I’ve talked with her,’’ Tony says. ‘’I know. It’s just – it’s going to take some time, right? I’ve already said she could file for divorce.’’

‘’It’s okay to be mad,’’ Rhodey says.

Tony leans back his head before looking his friend in the eye. Rhodey is sitting with one arm slung over the couch, his eyes intent. ‘’I’m not mad,’’ Tony tells him. ‘’I’m just – tired. I’ve always been – you know, Pepper and I were on and off, before. I always thought we’d end up together, eventually. Then we did, but it’s not forever, as it turns out. But – things turn out the way they’re meant to be. If I don’t believe that, right now, I’m not going to make things any easier. I got a few good years, and I have Morgan. I’ll only see more of Peter, too, probably, if I make it back. I’m not going to be _alone_ , Rhodey, I know that. And I can’t even worry about it, because there’s a thousand other things to worry about, right now.’’

Rhodey is still looking at him, searching for something. Tony does not know if he finds it, but his friend relaxes somewhat after a few seconds. Tony remembers the day he’d married Pepper – the quiet affair that it had been. Half the world was gone in dust, and the other half was mourning. There had been no party, and there had been no rejoicing. But those few years – those had been their bad times, and they’d needed that promise. To be there in the good times, and the bad. The good times had followed soon enough, with Morgan being born.

So they’d promised, and they’d made a life. Made something of everything that was left – a second chance, maybe. Though perhaps he got a second chance long before – maybe the second chance started in a cave, years earlier. 

But here he is, with more chances than any other man would be lucky enough to have. Start with a car battery, and end with a spaceship.

Rhodey rises from the couch, and offers him a hand. Tony takes it, allowing himself to be helped up. ‘’You should get some rest,’’ Rhodey points out, clasping his shoulder. ‘’I’ve got some stuff I need to do.’’

~*~

The leaves rustle on the wind; the only sound Stephen can hear, as he watches Wong contemplate his offer with a pained expression. The librarian has always had his reservations about Stephen’s sense of duty and guilt towards Tony Stark, but this was the moment to make a choice.

A judgment day, so to say. Stephen does not hurry his friend – just watches him weigh his options.

‘’You are not the same man as you were when you came to us,’’ Wong says eventually.

Stephen can’t help but tilt his lips. ‘’What makes you say that?’’

Wong sighs. ‘’The Ancient One had her doubts, at first. She feared your arrogance – she was afraid it would be your downfall, one day. That you would be too sure of your own importance, even if you believed none of it mattered. And here you are, knowing that everyone has a role to play in the world, and yet not as humble as you’ve ever been.’’

‘’I’m not anywhere near humble,’’ Stephen snorts, because it’s true. He is the best sorcerer they have: he would not be the Sorcerer Supreme, if he had not been. He is proud of his knowledge, because he worked for it – he earned his title and his place. He does not mind letting others know. But perhaps, in a way – yes, he knows that it is not about him. He has learnt that, at least.

He still remembers the lesson quite keenly, as the Ancient One had watched him in her last breaths. 

‘’And yet, you do not hesitate to leave your duties to someone else.’’

‘’Wong, it is only for a short period,’’ Stephen says patiently. ‘’Tony Stark has powers that only I can shield him from – powers that may prove to be dangerous, need I remind you, to more than just us. I will deliver him safely to Zenn-La, see him healed, and return. The Cloak will remain here to protect the Sanctum along with you.’’

‘’So you are sure of this?’’ Wong asks.

Stephen smiles wryly. ‘’He asked for my help this time, Wong. And he will die if I don’t. I am a doctor, first and foremost – I will not let him die. Not if I can help it.’’

Wong nods. ‘’You know that I don’t want to see you leave, but alright. We will guard the Sanctum without you, and wait for your return.’’

~*~

Strange appears early in the morning. It is still dark outside, when Tony finds him waiting in front of the conference room. He is only half-awake, so the sight of the sorcerer startles him somewhat.

‘’How long have you been here?’’ he asks, his voice still rough from sleep. He blinks as Strange turns to look at him. ‘’How did you even get – wait, the portals. Man, don’t you ever get in trouble for that? Suddenly appearing somewhere?’’

Strange’s lips tilt into a mischievous smile. ‘’No one likes trouble with a sorcerer.’’

‘’I can imagine,’’ Tony says and walks past Strange to turn on the lights in the conference room, sitting down in the first chair he reaches. ‘’I thought you’d be here later. I don’t think anyone is even awake.’’

‘’I saw Danvers training,’’ Strange offers. ‘’I think she’ll join us shortly.’’

He sits down as well. Tony smiles tightly as the icy blue eyes linger on him. He wishes that Strange was easier to read – he wants to know the answer, even if he is afraid to ask the question. His desire to know wins, however, as he knew it would.

‘’Did you decide yet?’’ he asks, his face calm. Maybe it is a sad attempt at imitating the sorcerer – pretending he does not care. It is his life that is at stake and everyone knows it. 

Strange nods – a single firm gesture. ‘’I promised you I’d help,’’ the doctor says quietly. ‘’I’ve been making that promise for four years. I do not regret what I did – I never will. But I regret what happened to you. You deserve more, Tony. So yes. I will come.’’

Tony feels his breath hitch for a second. He leans back in his chair, emotions racing through him. He is one step closer to going to space, now, and the thought is both exhilarating and frightening. The overwhelming relief wins, however, and that makes him realize how much this means to him. How much he wants this chance to live, despite his fear.

What is fear, when you have faced the most dangerous monster in the galaxy, and won? What would he not do to have more time with his family? This is nothing, in comparison. He would do a lot more for the chance to see Morgan grow up. 

‘’Thank you,’’ he says, for the first time.

Strange looks away, as if he is undeserving. After all he has done to help Tony, as if it means nothing.

‘’You are welcome,’’ he quietly answers, before Tony can press it. 

They don’t say anything else, as they wait for the others to come.

~*~

After that, it is mostly minor decisions that have to be made. There is a spaceship ready for them, relatively big for only three people. It is as luxurious as travelling in space can be – driven by arc reactor technology and with many modifications suggested by people more experienced with space travel, the entire branch had been revolutionized. Tony has been sleeping for four years, but he imagines he’ll have some new ideas for spaceships when he gets back from his journey.

If he gets back from his journey. And if he still has time after, anyway. He should be careful with making too many plans for the future.

Tony has never thought too much about life in space, but Rhodey and Carol go through a list of necessities in minutes. He just sits by and lets them take care of it – all he takes care to pack is his arc reactor, containing his suit. It is not the same suit that he fought Thanos in, as that one didn’t survive the battle, but it’s a similar model. It should work just fine.

He considers not bringing the Iron Man suit for only a single second. A great deal of strength has already returned to him, but he is still reminded daily that he is not back to what he used to be. He isn’t the youngest man anymore – even if the Time Stone in his veins stopped him from aging, he wasn’t young when this started in the first place – and he is weary, and he does not want to fight anymore. But then he thinks of finding another Mad Titan in between the stars, ready to kill him and make sure he never sees Morgan again, and his heart restricts. He cannot take any chances, so he has to bring it.

The only other things he brings is a recorder. He has always tended to talk out loud without a purpose, but when Morgan was born, a lot of his ramblings had been for her. She’d enjoyed the sound of his voice, as a baby, and he remembers it well. He’d held her in his arms – he’d only needed the one arm, back then, but he’d used two to make sure he didn’t drop her – and just talked to her for hours. He’d talked about everything – about atoms, about robots, about Pepper, about how cute he thought her toes were. Not a single thought had gone unspoken, to her.

So she is not coming on this trip, but he is going to talk to her, anyway. And if they can, maybe there’s a place on the other side of the galaxy that can reach her, so he can let her listen. So that she can still fall asleep to the sound of his voice, and he can sleep in the knowledge that his daughter will still have something of him whether this plan succeeds or not.

He’s not going to say goodbye, but he can tell her other things. Just so she knows how loved she is.

So he has his two belongings and the suit that Strange had enchanted for him, listens to Danvers prepare their journey and explain space regulations to Rhodey, and waits for the time to leave.

~*~

Stephen stares at the ship with some reluctance. He had only been on one spaceship before – because he’d been kidnapped. It had not been much of a fun experience. 

It seems he is going to be sharing all his trips to space with Tony Stark. Well, assuming this will be his last trip. And he is not really in the mood for leaving his planet more often than he already has. Twice is enough – more than enough. More than he ever expected himself to.

Two weeks have passed since Stephen told the others that he would come. Everything has been arranged in that time. Wong stands besides him, interim-leader of the Sanctum. The sorcerers have open minds, however, and Stephen has proven his strength before. No one had questioned him, though he had seen the doubting glances.

Well. This is something that he has to do – as sorcerer, as doctor, and as the man he wants himself to be. There is a life to save, so he means to save it. Like he has always wanted.

Tony is standing a few feet away. His face is pale, but his expression is pure steel. Stephen knows that Tony is fully aware of how necessary it is to get his powers under control – he had lost control a number of times, during the preparation. From the looks of it, it never gets any easier. Stephen had not managed to be there for all of the attacks, but nothing but furniture had suffered under it.

It could have been different. He has read that thought in Tony’s eyes time and time again. But he has not once complained, once this decision was made.

There is a group of people waiting for them, to see them off. For Stephen, only Wong is there – who else would there be? Still, he feels rather awkward as he stands there alone with his one friend, while Tony and Rhodes are surrounded by loved ones. He is a world apart – he doesn’t belong with them, not actually. Maybe it’s for the better, this way.

His only consolation is Danvers standing apart from the group as well, at the entrance of the ships. Her brow is a stark line, betraying nothing but the fact that she is watching them all. Her gaze meets Stephen’s – she smirk at him for a second before turning away.

Stephen feels like an intruder – always seems to feel like one, when it comes to the Stark family. He can’t make himself watch away as he sees Tony crouch to the ground, his daughter’s mourning sobs audible to him, no matter how much she tries to be quiet. Her eyes are pressed close, and Stephen can only see one side of Tony’s face as the man presses his face into her dark hair. He whispers something to her, slowly rubbing her back as she holds onto her father like he is a lifeline.

Peter is the next one. The young man doesn’t cry, as far as Stephen can see, but that does not mean he is any less emotional. His grief is written all over his face – Stephen knows, because he saw the same expression on the battlefield. His knuckles are white as he holds onto his mentor, and his lips a tight line. 

There seem to be a dozen people to say goodbye to for Tony – May, Happy, Bruce. Everyone just gathers around him, hugging him and wishing him luck. 

Maybe Stephen is glad to only be here with Wong. He remembers Tony telling him that he was afraid of not getting to say his goodbyes, but this feels too permanent to him. There may be such a thing as too _many_ goodbyes, as well, when they press on your shoulders. And he can see the pressure build on Tony, by the tightening of his eyes with every word he says.

When Tony reaches Pepper, he stands before her for a long time, not saying a word. The woman who used to be his companion just stands as quietly as he is. Maybe they do not need words, anymore. Maybe they’ve passed that stage long ago.

Stephen turns away from them, feeling uncomfortable watching them. ‘’We will leave soon,’’ he says to Wong, and takes off his Cloak. It struggles a bit, but once he gets it off, it does not return to his shoulders. ‘’The Cloak of Levitation will help you protect the Sanctum. And in turn, I want you to protect it until I get back.’’

Wong harrumphs. ‘’No one will be able to keep it in check. Its only loyalty is to you.’’

‘’And my loyalty is to the Sanctum,’’ Stephen reminds him gently. ‘’It won’t give you any trouble. Well, too much trouble. It’s still the Cloak, after all.’’

The Cloak moves as if shrugging, and Stephen finds himself smiling. It is a fickle thing, indeed, but he feels better if it can stay in the Sanctum. Cloaks are not made for the cold abyss of space, after all. Not even one as loyal as the one he wears daily.

‘’We’ll take care of things on our side,’’ Wong says, surprisingly kind. ‘’Good luck, Stephen.’’

‘’Thank you,’’ he answers, inclining his head. ‘’Make sure the Cloak doesn’t scare too many passengers. It’s its new pastime.’’

Wong frowns even as Stephen grins, and he turns away. He will miss Wong and the Sanctum, but there is nothing left to say. They have discussed everything already – all there is left to do is get on the ship and leave.

Danvers is inside already, apparently having witnessed enough. Tony is still standing there, absentmindedly playing with the zipper on his jacket. ‘’Are we leaving?’’ he asks. 

‘’We are,’’ Rhodes says, and Stephen straightens. A question forms on his lips, but Tony whips upright and stares at his friend before he can say anything.

‘’But you’re not coming,’’ Tony says, looking towards Pepper as if she will confirm what he is saying. Everyone else has made their way back already, getting out of range for the space ship. Only Pepper, Peter and Morgan are still left – perhaps waiting for a last word before Tony disappears into the stars.

Rhodes shrugs. ‘’You thought I was going to leave you? I’ve had your back since you were a scrawny teenager, Tones, and that’s not going to change. I’ve discussed it with Carol. I’m coming with you.’’

‘’How about discussing it with me?’’ Tony asks. ‘’Rhodey, if this goes wrong –‘’

‘’Then I’ll have been by your side for it,’’ Rhodes interferes calmly. Stephen can see that there is no swaying the general’s mind – not that he would care to. Maybe Rhodes’ presence would make things easier, on the ship. 

‘’We’re leaving,’’ Danvers shouts at them, before her head disappears back into the ship. She is not a patient woman, so Stephen sighs. He can see the moment Tony’s shoulders slump, and his defiance disappears.

The ship’s engine is starting. ‘’We better get on that ship,’’ Stephen says quietly, and turns to do so. He hears murmurs behind him before he gets into what will be his living space for the trip – Rhodes and Tony follow after a minute.

They have said their goodbyes. Stephen does not comment on the way that Rhodes presses Tony against him, for a moment, when they come aboard. Tony takes a deep breath and closes his eyes – like something has fallen away from him, but he is still holding the world.

Maybe he has always carried that burden, but he can carry it with his friend, now. Stephen makes sure he gives them some privacy, and finds the cockpit to sit next to Danvers instead. She does not look at him as she checks everything on her monitor. There are so many buttons and options that Stephen would not know where to begin, but Danvers seems to do everything on auto-pilot.

‘’Have you been to space before?’’ she asks him suddenly. 

Stephen looks at her. Her eyebrows are slightly raised, as if she is amused at his wonderment. ‘’Only once,’’ he says honestly. ‘’But I was kidnapped unto a ship and tortured, so I didn’t see much of the techniques behind it.’’

The amusement falls away at once. ‘’I’m sorry,’’ Danvers offers. ‘’Most of the people on Earth seem to have bad experiences in space.’’

‘’Most of our experiences are with evil aliens who want us dead,’’ Stephen says. His abruptness seems to please her – a small smirk graces her lips before she turns away again. Stephen keeps quiet as he watches her work. He will be stuck with her on a spaceship for the foreseeable future, so it would be nice if they got along.

Stephen holds onto the chair as the ship starts up – they don’t tremble. They fly as smoothly as he can with the Cloak’s help, and he would barely believe that they are going up in the air, had he not been able to see them surge past the clouds with inhuman speed.

Danvers is just smiling – maybe Earth isn’t for her, after all. She is human, essentially, but the broad emptiness of space is her home. ‘’I’ll go check up on Tony and Rhodes,’’ he says, unbuckling once he can. They are already in space, when he does – darkness surrounds them and he can feels its chill, even inside.

She only answers with a nod, and Stephen moves. Tony sits next to Rhodes, still and unmoving but with his eyes pressed closed. He holds something in his hands – it glints, and Stephen narrows his eyes before he sees it is a tool, of some sort.

‘’Are you alright?’’ he asks. 

Rhodes shifts slightly as Tony opens his eyes. ‘’We’re back in space,’’ the inventor says hollowly. ‘’I know what they say about dumb questions not being a thing, but I disagree, because that’s one.’’

Stephen nods and takes a deep breath, not taking the sharp answer personally. All around them, the world has disappeared. They are moving into the nothing now, travelling to the other end of the galaxy. Four lonely humans on a spaceship, on a quest to save a single life – the life that saved half of the universe.

The journey has begun.


End file.
